About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

WEDNESDAY #2540


One Of My Very Own…








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There are many of these on one of the sites I visit regularly. People with jobs post pictures of what it's really like every day.

Then there is this stripper.
She writes:

"This happens all the time. Someone thinks they can abuse the new guy and get away with it. Damn he was persistent! The door guy notices almost immediately when the customer gets aggressive and out into the cold street he goes.
Used the $5 to buy raspberries."


I once critiqued a book for a poetry and literary magazine. The book was "Carnival Strippers" and the author traveled with a Southern carnival for off and on a whole year.

I have seen such carnivals, and back in their heyday the "strippers" would come out on stage naked then the show began. They would regularly squat down in from of a man on the front row and let him lick her vagina. There major complain? When some drunk asshole bit her clitoris.
Remember that the next time you say you hate your job.

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Speaking of...

This is a system for collecting casings at the range.
And those are some serious shells.

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They think that two gigantic armies on horseback, one led by the devil and one led by Mohommed, will collide on the ground they now occupy and the world will end as prophesied. Many Christians still think the same thing. I was told that is why some very pious Christians want to arm Israel, since they will be our ally in the battle.

I'm sure you have all heard about Daesh handing out speed pills like candy. They say some can fight for days without sleep.


This is old news but I still like it.


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A guy I know went to Las Vegas for the expressed purpose of photographing the “Sign Graveyard.” He rented special lenses and even paid to have it to himself at sun up and sun down. He showed me some of his pics and I can’t tell you how awful they were. They looked exactly like every other picture I have seen of it.
I call the above a tourist snapshot. Stand up straight and get as much in the scene as possible.
I suggested that he try visually overlapping of colors and words...

Or surprising juxtaposition...

I tried to talk to him about close-ups.

Or the inclusion of old and new...
But he cut me off with "Oh, I have better ones at home."
Just trying to help, folks. Just trying to help.

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I so want to like this image.
Besides the dramatic view you have the similarity of the veins in the leaf, the tines of the antlers and the limbs on the tree. That is wonderful.
But I can not make myself believe that it wasn't photoshopped, which is a shame.

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MURALS I CAN'T REMEMBER SEEING BEFORE


I had to paint a dozen or so people looking over a balcony lit from below and it is much trickier than one would first imagine. This person did an excellent job.

I wonder how many people will get this last one.

I once painted something very similar to this.
Mine had stable door instead of windows, but there were four of them about six feet apart. Two of them were looking straight out at the viewer, the third was looking to its right, and on the right I had a cow wearing sunglasses.
Yeah, I used to do stuff like that.

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Blood clot removal...
Amazing.

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A Japanese officer from the 7 Area Army Headquarters lays his sword beside those of his fellow officers at an official ceremony of surrender.

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Me: You are correcting my every word for the last twenty-two years of our marriage.

Wife: The last 23 years.


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We could all use another look at this...

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Social media is great. Before Facebook I'd never know what the guy who wrote "dirty Jew" on my bar's bathroom wall was thankful for this year.


How wonderful.
 I wonder how many times that has happened?

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I called about donating my body to science after I die. Science said, "No thanks, we're good.



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As a kid, I used to think $5,000 was a lot of money. But now that I'm an adult, I think it's a tremendous amount of money.


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 Well the Internet said it so it must be true.


Life is so unfair.



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Actors recalling their favorite roles.
 And my favorite...

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I called my urologist and they put me on hold.


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 This Megaphone Translates Japanese Into Different Languages


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If you have a boyfriend who wears pants like this, you don't have a boyfriend; you've got a girlfriend.

Of course, if you take pictures of other guys' butts, that could be telling also.


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It says a lot that they copy our products and their citizens buy the shit out of it. So, being a Capitalist has its advantages.

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Does England really have a tax on sanitary products for women? I know I have many English viewers. Could you explain this to us?


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I smile when I read that. You finally get that degree you went in debt to get, then you see that first paycheck and over a third of "your" money is given to the government.

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 Wait for it...

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When you ask your waiter for an extra pickle, don't wink. It can easily be misinterpreted.


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1 comment:

William Lockwood said...

http://cdn.memestache.com/2012/11/14/7b7e150318dc574c023067b5e15aae54.jpg

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