About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, January 18, 2016

MONDAY #2586


One Of My Very Own…



This good man has been an independent for a long, long time.

In other political matters...

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Doesn't matter how you feel about climate change, this is weird.
But before we accept it as "proof," what was going on 78 years ago to cause it? 

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 Did I mention I'm 69 years old?

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My Packers lost a heartbreaker.
 But I bet twice as much as I usually do and they gave me the Packers and 7 points.
I have never seen a coin not flip.
I tried. You try. Take a coin and try to throw it in the air without it turning over.
This was every Packer fan in the world, since they won the first no-flip flip.

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Then there's these poor bastards:

Forty-two employees of Grissini’s Restaurant in Englewood Cliffs, New Jersey, pooled $210 and bought Powerball lottery tickets in time for Saturday’s drawing. The jackpot was at $949 million at the time. Saturday night, a friend texted the latest Powerball numbers to the restaurant (2, 11, 47, 62, 63 and 17)-and all the numbers matched one of their tickets! There was much rejoicing, and one dishwasher threw off his apron and quit his job. Bartender Charles Poveromo called his wife, and she suggested they double-check the numbers. That’s when they found out that the website hadn’t yet been updated after the drawing, and the numbers were that of the previous drawing on Wednesday. The 20 minutes of euphoria were over. There’s no word on the dishwasher who quit his job. 




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I'll let this speak for itself...

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 Coaches are very special people...

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Maybe just like we have to pretend to be asleep before we can fall asleep, we also have to pretend to be in love before we actually fall in love.


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I found that very funny. It's a visual joke.

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I posted this several days ago and stated that I couldn't figure out what it was.
I thought maybe it was lines of some kind of migrating animals making their way through an orchard. But no.

A field of dead almond trees is seen in Coalinga in the Central Valley, California. I'm assuming the black shapes are exposed root balls from the fallen trees.


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 A biologist observed falcons capturing smaller birds, plucking off their tail and wing feathers, then storing them in holes in rocks for later consumption. Although scientists have seen birds storing dead animals for later meals, this is the first time that anyone has seen birds stocking live animals.


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Never really thought about like this before...

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My little sister was killed by a Ouija board demon named Zozo, and I can’t tell anyone except for three of my closest friends because no one would believe me.


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Some people just refuse to be ignored.

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Stranger: I grew a beard once and it actually looked just like yours.
Me: Why'd you shave it off?
Stranger: I just told you. 


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Fractals in nature...

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66% of Canadians were unimpressed with "The Revenant," or as it's known in Canada, "Why I'm a Little Late To Work."


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Interviewer: Do you have any final questions?
Me: HYPOTHETICALLY, what happens to people who drink on their lunch breaks?


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The worst tutorial in the history of tutorials.

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Now THAT, Gentle Reader, is a rough neighborhood.

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Ladies, if you don't want to answer a question from a guy, say, "I already TOLD you. You never listen." We have no idea if you're lying.


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Somebody try this and let me know.

If you add the baking soda to the CA, it makes this incredibly strong ... much more substantive bond … You can even cut it and carve it.


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I ran across this as the perfect example of an observation I tried to explain about the cosmic web. They report that that there is a huge hole in it, and I opined that if you could look at it from many angles there may be more than one "hole."

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My bet is that this is the mother protecting her chicks.

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Me: How’s that little boy of yours doing?
Friend: He lost his first tooth.
Me: Aaaah.
Friend: In a fight with a bouncer.


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I rebuilt my own kitchen from ground up. For months I lived in constant fear that this would happen.

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Public Art to make me chuckle...
 I wish they had painted one blue and one red.

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If it works it ain't silly...

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Me: You into role playing?
Wife: Kinky, what do you have in mind?
Me: You fake a heart attack and we get our meals for free.


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From the O...


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We all know rich people buy their way out of jail.
But when that judge says, "$57 or 57 days," it means totally different punishment if you simply don't have $57. 

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Molten metal poured in an ant hill.
 Fascinating.

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I'm starting to think the frog dissection skills I learned in high school are never going to pay off.


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The Girl Who Fell From The Sky
 They edited the clip about the hover board going in the pool.

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A couple of reposts for my newer viewers...

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This man just imagined things...the most wonderful things.

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I would be more inclined to grow up if I saw that it worked out for everyone else.


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I have some questions...
His pants are down. Ever how he got stabbed happened while his pants were down. I'm thinking the farmer caught him in the barn with his daughter. All in all I would say he was very fortunate. 

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All animals all over the world sound the same. It’s not like they speak different languages, they make the same noises even if they’re different countries! But why is it that different languages think animals make different sounds? It’s because we’re giving names to the sounds that animals make in the construct of language, not totally mimicking what they’re saying (different languages have different rules and some languages have more versatile phrasing). That’s how a duck can quack in English, ga ga in Japanese, coin coin in French, kyra kyra in Russian, and so on.


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Three Million Bats Going Night Hunting


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Would you start doubting your sanity?

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PERCUSSION MAINTENANCE is the technical term for hitting something until it works.


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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Animals actually spek in different dialects:

http://www.thenakedscientists.com/HTML/questions/question/2428/

just one reference I found at a glance.

Cheers,

Burkhard

Anonymous said...

ah, and I forgot:

the pants are looking ripped/cut off.

Anonymous said...

regarding baking soda/super glue...this is a fairly common trick for guitar repair. The bicarbonate in the baking soda accelerates the chemical reaction of the polymerization of the super glue, almost as though its forming an instant cement. You can also incorporate colorized sawdust into the mix and use for small repairs of chips in wood.

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