About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Wednesday, June 15, 2016

WEDNESDAY #2733

One Of My Very Own…



ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com





Anderson Cooper reads the names of the Orlando Victims, never mentions the killer or shows his face.

And he broke up several times...and so did I.

This is the Orlando PD SWAT officer who took a bullet to the helmet during the Pulse raid that rescued over 30 hostages.


The question begs asking: How is it that with 200 adults being targeted, why didn't they just rush the guy?

This from another officer...




The no true Scotsman argument is tired and ignorant. The person who shot up that club was Muslim. The Muslims who are peaceful are also Muslims. Islam is based on belief. If a person believes in it, and follows it as they see fit, they ARE a Muslim. This is how religions work. You can't make up rules about it and then describe anyone else with a different set of rules as "not a true follower."

The same is true with any religion. Westboro Baptist church? They're Christians. Just as much as a rapist priest, Martin Luther King Jr, the pastor for the church up the road, or the crusaders.

Good news! Pulse Nightclub survivor, Angel Colon, is out of surgery and on his way to recovery.

Angel. Colon. Homosexual.

What's next - Clitoris Throbbin, Lesbian?

Can't find humor in something so awful?


Or...

Hating people because of their race, religion or sexuality just isn't right. They can't help that they were born wrong.


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What a save!


Mexico goal Monday night was one of the best soccer moves I have ever seen. He threaded his way through seven defenders and nailed it.

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Well, it finally happened...

One of my mail packets was returned to me with the dollar bill stolen. Only one so far. I find that...encouraging.



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The Revenant was just TakeYourSonToWorkDay taken to the extreme. 

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The flaw in the system...


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When you get your Ph.D. in Finland, you receive a top hat and a sword.

Yeah they are that awesome.

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Problem solved.


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A book club that has been stuck on the same book for two thousand years.


And this interest me very much...


I did research it, and couldn't find a definitive answer about how much it would have to rain, per hour, on every square inch on earth, to flood the world over Mount Everest if it rained for 40 days. Please, somebody figure that out for me.
I actually considered how much water it would take to fill the areas below sea level, but it is too small an area to alter the equation enough to matter.
Seriously, I need help with this.

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It is called a scarf joint and it makes be feel good about being human.


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I once masturbated so furiously I tore my rotator cup. 

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Trust me, this is a good idea...

Beards are a push-up bra for guys' faces.

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Having a beard from being too lazy to shave helps cover my double-chin from being too lazy to exercise.

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That is my kind of humor.

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How impressive...


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If your wife is mad with you, just put a cape on her and say, "Now you are super mad." She will laugh and laugh.

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Write this shit down...


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I think if you can't legally drink at your own wedding you are too young to be getting married. 

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This is not my kind of humor...


But I still smiled.

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Aral Sea: I learned something. I always this was due to climate change.

What used to be one of the largest lakes in the world is now 10% of it's original size because of mismanagement by Soviet irrigation projects since the 1960's.

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I'm assuming this is an art installation, with dollars, so I had to post it.


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Want to piss off your wife? When she texts you reply "He's busy," and turn your phone off. 

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????


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Person: Do you want to come to my party?
Me: Let me ask my mom.
Person: You are 70 years old and you mom died 10 years ago.
Me: She said no. 

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I invented a new drinking game. Here's how you play: Every time you have alcohol - you drink it. It's called "Don't Be A Pussy."

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Men do shit like this every single time...


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The caption read:
Thugs can never run from the cops because their pants are always sagged.

Black people making fun of black people. How refreshing.

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Tomorrow is National Slap Your Annoying Coworker Day. If you're not sure who that is, I'd call in sick. 

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I once told my daughter that the zoo animals came to work in the morning, then went home at night. 

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When my wife was still drinking, someone asked her if she was a red or a white wine person. She answered, "Honey, I'd suck the alcohol out of a stick deodorant." 

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Tilt Shifting Fun





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I am not an early bird or a night owl. I'm some form of permanently exhausted other kind of lazy bird. 

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Exam supervision flaw...

Russian style.

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2,200 year old paint, preserved by the dry desert air.


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I think women who say size doesn't matter are just shallow.
Just. Shallow.

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I've started responding to "Have a good day" with a rather angry "No, YOU have a good day!" Cause I'm an asshole. 

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Well, I think you a evil moron. There I've said it and I'm not sorry I said it. I'm speaking for all those Africans who suffered in slavery for generations because your bible gave instructions on how to treat your slaves, which made it alright.



2 comments:

Andy said...

http://cheezburger.com/826629/guy-destroys-homophobic-haters-with-brilliant-rant-on-bible-hypocrisy

Ninja Grrrl said...

Why didn't they swarm the guy? I doubt they could communicate with each other at all in those first crucial minutes. They couldn't see or hear each other. They were surrounded by dim light and loud music, and then there was gunfire and people were dying, I'm sure it was absolute chaos. Without even being able to make eye contact with each other, I don't know how you can plot. That's my assumption anyway.

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