About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

TUESDAY #2808

One Of My Very Own…



EMAIL
ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
KEY PACKET TUTORIAL
http://folioolio.blogspot.com/2015/07/key-packet-tutorial.html




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Thought up a riddle in my dreams last night:

What do we regularly fix even though it isn't broken?


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Pets. We fix pets.
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Has anyone checked whether cows really have 4 stomachs? Because it kinda sounds like a lie a cow made up once to get more food.


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Amazing contrasts - Mark Laita (photographer)




Powerful stuff.

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Man legally spear hunts and kills a bear and people immediately start sending him death threats.

Did you even know that was a thing? I didn't.
The excuse for being upset was that a high powered rifle killed it faster so it would suffer less...like they would know about such things.

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My thing for lightning continues...


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I bought quick oats and my wife fussed at me because she wanted instant oats. Marriage.

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As a near deaf guy, I can not hear my trucks warning bells, much less the hardly audible blinker noise. Drives the wife nuts.

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I know it's shallow of me, but all I can think about is the maintenance such hair requires. How does she even roll over at night without catching it on an elbow or a knee or an ankle?

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Farm problems...(?)...

Actually, I don't see the problem. I would love a spontaneously unique design on my porch. I would look at it every day and think about that chicken.

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How to not approach a police car

How could anyone do just a thing in this day and age? And remember, he must have seen that the cop had his taser out and aimed, yet he STILL advanced!

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From movie Inception



I talked to a stoolmate tonight about that very thing...kind of. My very good friend, Carl Copeland, was a set builder for a whole bunch of movies. One of them was a B film about voodoo in Haiti. There were a lot of unusual stories about that gig - like having to move the whole production to the Dominican Republic because everything at the Haitian location got stolen immediately after it came out of the trucks. Anyway, in one scene the hall that the hero walked down was supposed to warp...not as severe as the above, but just twist from right to left. The producers brought in an engineer who designed a metal contraption with hydraulic lifts and intricate controls that costs a fortune. My friend suggested just building an identical hallway out of 1x3s and 1/4" plywood and jacked it up and down with a dozen guys prying with 4/4s. It worked perfectly and cost a small fraction of the engineers design.

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You've got to love the Russians...



I'm not sure why, but almost every picture of Russians I come across has them wearing clothing with white stripes running up the side. Look it up. It's true.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I present the stupidest woman in America...


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Buoyancy center is below the center of mass, as a result hourglass tries to flip itself 180 degrees and jams between the walls as a result. Sand gradually falls down and with it the center of mass, flipping torque reduced and hourglass breaks free.
I WANT ONE!

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Been a long time - too long - since I've posted Painted Ladies, here's one that doesn't look too pleased with the whole exercise...


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My wife is the lady paying with exact change and coupons, then gets pissed because the credit card chip reader takes too long.

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How to get phone privacy...


Someone commented, "It's just removing the polarizer from the LCD, and then using polarized glasses to make it readable."
If it works, it works, asshole, why inject the "just" like it's no big deal.

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This speaks for itself...


Never having met Amy I still know exactly where she's coming from. So many times something extraordinary has happened to me and I look around and there was no adult witness...I was an elementary school teach and children witnesses don't count.

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Oh, my...I see she has an interesting hobby...


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2016 is like if the state of Florida became a year.

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Whitest man in Arkansas...

But don't his teeth fit well.

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Watched a French film and the time was given this way and subtitle...

Okay, I get the 24 hour (sane) clock, but what's the H for? Anyone?
Don't like the 24 hour clock? Think about never having to add AM or PM ever again.
Seriously, why the H? One of you guys has to know.

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Shitter porn...


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I try my best not to pull that shit on young people, but the other day a young man told me he needed to grow up. He said he was 25 years old and continues to drink and party like a 19 year old frat boy. I told him that when I was about his age I had already spent 4 years in the military, had a masters degree, married, two children and a job. He said, so, you see my point. I did and said so, then told him he needed a wife. He said, "Exactly."

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Next time you think your problems are overwhelming, think of this kid...


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A couple of reposts I still enjoyed...


"I don't believe you."

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Being an adult is just a competition to see how many times you can say "storage space" before you die.

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4 comments:

Larry said...

The painted ladies thing, the girl on the far right seems to be pleasing herself, she has her hand down her pants!

Anonymous said...

16 H(ours) 53 (minutes) ?

Robin said...

I am thinking that the H, which does indicate Hours as Anonymous guessed, is so that you know that it is a time being shown onscreen, and not, for example, an indication that the next scene is set in 1653.

Ralph Henry said...

That makes perfect sense.

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