About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Saturday, September 10, 2016

SATURDAY #2819

One Of My Very Own…

He can probably see the outline of her nipples.


EMAIL
ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
KEY PACKET TUTORIAL
http://folioolio.blogspot.com/2015/07/key-packet-tutorial.html



My wife in a nutshell:
"I was asked yesterday to help find a sponsor for an upcoming Alzheimer's fundraiser. When she said it was $1500. I told her why hell, I can probably get 15 women to donate 100 bucks each and we'll call ourselves the "Wide Open Vah Jay Jays".
Their publication is called Fuck Alzheimers.
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John Mayall & Gary Moore ~ If I Don’t Get Home …


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NASA has managed to propel laser beams to faster than light speeds...

"The NASA engineers also reported on the forums that they'd fired lasers into the EM Drive's resonance chamber and that some of the laser beams had travelled faster than the speed of light, at around 300,000 kilometres per second... suggesting that the EM Drive may have produced a warp bubble like the kind that allows travel faster than the speed of light in Star Trek."So far despite a thorough attempts to poke holes in the res ults, the engine seems to hold up.
The magnitude of change to our society this has the potential to create is staggering.
(or it's a calibration error)

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This might be the creepiest news item of 2016. A 43-year-old Oklahoma mother married her 25-year-old biological daughter and it could cost them 10 years in prison.

Patricia Ann Spann and her daughter Misty Velvet Dawn Spann (that name) are wanted on charges of incest after a child welfare investigator busted the married couple, but this is not mom’s first time at the alter. She also married one of her sons in 2008, Jody Spann Jr. He filed for an annulment 15 months later, citing “incest” as his reason. Good reason.
Patricia Ann says she didn’t think she was committing incest because she changed her last name. She was no longer a Spann, she was a Clayton at the time of her marriage to her daughter. Honest mistake!
How many drugs must she have consumed in her life?
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I'm ready for the new iPod!







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The escalator at the gym is broken, this is BULLSHIT.

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Life.

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Worst bar graph ever


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Wife hasn't done laundry in so long she had to wear her prom dress to the grocery store.

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Here's a couple of bar bets you are sure to win.

Guess how many time zones there are in Antarctica. Only 11.
And here's another: Which country - with its dependent territories - covers the most time zones?
France at 12.
USA and Russia tied at 11.


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My wife's "signature sex move" is Judgmental Corpse.

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Oh, my....

Those are feet in a pail of water.

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This guy is good!


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Archaeologists dug up the gold artifact, which is just an eight of an inch in diameter and dates from 4,500–4,600 B.C., at what was believed to be the first urban settlement in Europe. It’s just outside of the modern town of Pazardzhik [Bulgaria].

What’s particularly interesting about the item is that researchers believe it to be 200 years older than gold jewelry discovered back in 1976 in the coastal town of Varna, thought to be the oldest in existence. That would make this speck-like bead the oldest piece of gold in the world.

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It is called "Jet lightning."
The gigantic jet appears to start somewhere in a nearby thundercloud and extend upwards towards Earth's ionosphere.

The nature of gigantic jets and their possible association with other types of Transient Luminous Events (TLEs) such as blue jets and red sprites remains an active topic of research.
The only way they caught it on film was that the camera had an automatic shutter release when it detected any movement (meteor shower).

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Inventive little bastards, aren't they...


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I wonder how many of the men who stormed the beaches of normandy on d-day in World War 2 had their bellybuttons pierced.

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Neverwas Haul, A Steampunk Victorian-Era House On Wheels


That looks like a lot of fun.

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For my newer viewers...


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The fact touché and douche don't rhyme bothers me.

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Tattoos of interest...


And to a lesser extent...


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Ultracrepidarian: One who gives opinions beyond one’s area of expertise.

The story goes that in ancient Greece there was a renowned painter named Apelles who used to display his paintings and hide behind them to listen to the comments. Once a cobbler pointed out that the sole of the shoe was not painted correctly. Apelles fixed it and encouraged by this the cobbler began offering comments about other parts of the painting. At this point the painter cut him off with “Ne sutor ultra crepidam” meaning “Shoemaker, not above the sandal” or one should stick to one’s area of expertise.

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Papahānaumokuākea Marine National Monument, located in the Northwestern Hawaiian Islands, will expand from 139,818 square miles to 582,578 square miles. That’s bigger than the total land area of the state of Alaska – and makes Papahānaumokuākea larger than any other land or ocean conservation area on Earth.


Papahānaumokuākea Marine National Monument hosts an amazing array of wildlife, from 14 million seabirds representing 22 species that breed and nest within its boundaries, to over 7,000 species of marine life, one quarter of which are found only in the Hawaiian Archipelago.

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I have stumbled across this image a dozen times. I don't know exactly what it means, but thought one of you fine folk may...


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The original "Ben Hur" was a mega hit movie ....with ( 11 ) Oscars. The remake is a box office flop. A clear case of "Ben Hur, Done That."

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Grown-up Barbie...

Classic example of "High Maintenance Woman."

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Bison-drawn carriage in Sioux Falls, South Dakota 1900

One wonders why they weren't used more often.

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Two children and a man have died in Delhi after their throats were slit by glass-coated strings used for flying kites on Indian independence day.

Sanchi Goyal, three, and a four-year-old identified only as Harry, both suffered fatal injuries while looking out of the sunroof of their cars in different parts of the Indian capital on Monday. Zafar Khan, 22, died after his neck became entangled in a string while he was on his motorbike... “The manja [kite string] had cut through her neck, including the windpipe. The cut was so deep she died instantly.”

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Get it?

Seal team six.

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Some of my fondest memories involve a dirt road...

But I assume most rural born Southerners feel the same way. Our first kill with a rifle; our first car repair; our first intercourse.

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The trolls who rule the comment seas may actually have won because they often scare away people with their vicious attacks.

NPR is joining a growing list of media organizations that have said “finito” to comments including, ‘This American Life,’ Reuters, Recode, Mic, The Chicago Sun-Times, Popular Science, CNN, The Toronto Star and The Week.

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1.5kg black truffle found in Australia is a record setter.

It's worth more money than most folks make in a year.

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Back when people made personal statements with their cars.


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"It's time to turn over a new leaf."
  - Adam & Eve on laundry day

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I think I've been to this very spot...

I think it is in Alaska and those are seaplanes pulled up like boats. For a fee you can hire them to take you just about anywhere.

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This kind of stuff leaves me in awe...

The engineers of the Forth bridge demonstrate the principles of the cantilever construction by sitting on kitchen chairs. Sir John Fowler and Sir Benjamin Baker with their arms stretched out support Kaichi Watanabe sitting on a seat in the air between them.
One of my favorite quotes is: Anybody can built a bridge that doesn't fall dow, but only an engineer can build a bridge that just barely doesn't fall down.

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Typographic soup happened when bottle of degreaser leaked and got underneath the label.
Can you imagine finding that while tripping? But thinking more about that, you would probably see nothing unusual about it.

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This is from Earth...

But there are some very smart people trying to guess what life would look like on another planet...or moon.

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This reminds me of the story of my old friend, Bruce...

He got a new puppy and went to wake it up with a piece of bacon in his mouth hanging down toward the dog's nose just like the above. Well, the dog responded just like the one above, only it also latched onto Bruce's bottom lip with those sharp puppy teeth, then when Bruce jerked away the teeth ripped through causing a trip to the emergency room.

And this is what I say when my dog comes running when I call her and she's chewing something...


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Sometimes I find myself feeling hopeful for the future of the human race but then I remember there are grown men who like My Little Pony.

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This wonderful lady should not be forgotten...


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Fucking computers. Hot singles in my area have heard about me and are moving to other areas.

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That all those believers sitting around heaven and are just fine with their friends and family burning in hell tells you a lot about those people.

4 comments:

Robin said...

The image you wonder about, is a modern take on Socrates Cave Analogy. Instead of flames, its seems to be the flickering images of television, or perhaps specifically news programs that are preventing us seeing reality.

Ralph Henry said...

whaaaaat?

Robin said...

This might prove clearer at explaining that me :

https://philosophyzer.wordpress.com/2012/09/21/the-allegory-of-the-cave-by-plato-summary-and-meaning/

Ralph Henry said...

Aaaaah, I see. Thank you I can see clearly now.

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