About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Saturday, December 17, 2016

SATURDAY #2917

One Of My Very Own...

Two days before ‘International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women,’ a Moroccan state run TV channel pissed the world off by running a segment on how to cover up the bruises on your face with makeup, after your man beats you.

The station got so much anger and blowback, as a result they issued an apology saying it was their “error in judgement.” An error in judgement? That’s quite a fucking understatement.
But if you are a true believer...if you not only talk the talk but also walk the walk...

It is your duty as a Muslim man to keep the bitch in line.



How any modern woman can VOLUNTEER for this second-class status is beyond me.

Sana Hamze, the first Muslim student at Norwich University, on campus in Northfield, Vt.

And unlike the Christians, they don't have the convenient scapegoating of claiming the old testament doesn't apply anymore.

EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com



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Look sad dragging a kite on the ground at the park and sometimes people will let you join their picnic.

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YOUNG(ISH) PEOPLE

I know they have to be careful. No one wants to give a child to adults who will mistreat it. But there are just too many hoops to jump through. There must be a better, more streamlined way to get more children into loving homes.

This got me to thinking...

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I would like to apologize to the younger generation for my generation fucking everything up.

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I'm neither a conservative or liberal, but I can tell you this as a fact; conservatives are getting sick and tired of being called racist, Nazi, etc just because they don't agree with liberalism. In my opinion that aided in Trump's victory.
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Sure, young people today make outlandish fashion statements...

But not any more outlandish than other generations. Most of my young friends (poor) have actually shunned most chic fashion.
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Look, one of my favorite internet kids has grown up...


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It's never too late to be what you want to be, unless what you want to be is younger. Then you're screwed.

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OLD PEOPLE

When searching the internet for tidbits to share with you, this is the way I feel about each and every picture of a cat.


Almost everyone my age thinks children today are being over protected.

As a matter of fact, we are now living in a SAFER not more dangerous country. One of the reason is that we lock up far more criminals. I'm not a big fan of the USA being incarceration king, but with fewer criminals comes fewer crime.
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So my very old mother-in-law is in assisted living facility and each month is sent one of these catalogues.

Dr. Leonard has page after page of comfortable items for the oldest people.

But starting on page 22 their wares took a naughty turn...

That's right, page after page of dildo's for granny.
On the lower left you have a 2-pack of men's extenders...one ribbed to add "intense stimulation."
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Georgia O'Keeffe and Orville Cox
Photo by Ansel Adams, 1937

Ansel Adams. I mean, damn. And the look on her face. I bet her order from Dr. Leonard arrived.
I had always thought that was Will Rogers, but no. Orville Cox was the wrangler at Ghost Range and the guide on a several week trip taken by O'Keefe, Adams and others.

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I grew up with form did not follow function. Things were allowed to be beautiful back then.


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If you can't afford condoms you damn sure can't afford children.

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MORE ABOUT ME
Being old I remember these, but ours were screwed to the floor.

I think to curtail riots.
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This is exactly how I broke my arm and my leg.

Like her I couldn't get the ladder situated at the proper angle.
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This artist must have read Candide.

I wonder if schools make students read such things nowadays. I wrote a parody of that book; called it Candy and it took place in the 1960s.
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I pride myself on being a good listener.


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If you can't afford aluminum foil your thoughts are public domain.

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IMAGES IMAGES IMAGES IMAGES ...SOME RATHER ODD

The moon sets over a sculpture of the first cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin at the Russian leased Baikonur cosmodrome, the world’s largest operational space launch facility, Kazakhstan.

I'm the guy who thinks there ought to be a statue of him in every capital city in the world.
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People walk past the grave of film director Krzysztof Kieslowski, with a sculpture of hands forming a film frame, at the Old Powazki cemetery in Warsaw, Poland.

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Notice that the tracks more or less mimic the contour of the goose...

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This guy stacks and glues stacked stones.

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Rifles being fired...in Nairobi.

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A bird sits on SOS (Safety Orange Swimmers,) an art exhibit created by Ann Hirsh and Jeremy Angier that floats in the Fort Point Channel in Boston. Each orange foam figure represents nearly 1 million of the refugees in the world today.


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My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not.

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Those poor bastards...



You might want to be honest with your little snowflake before you sign her up for ballet lessons.

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I'll see your British pubs and your Danish churches and raise you all the American Mcdonalds locations.

It has occurred to me that there are only two major groups in America: those who are obsessed with keeping healthy and those who eat way too much.

So, what do the fat people do with all that time they save from not going to the gym or for long runs? Are you guys working on a cure for cancer or the next Mars rover?

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GOOD IDEAS


That took me longer than it should have.

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"I'm a little tipsy, so I think I'll trim my beard" ranks right up there with "I think I'll invade Russia in the winter" as worst ideas ever.

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AMAZING TIME LAPSE

Ucayali River, Peru


Jowf, Saudi Arabia


Khiran Peral City, Kuwait


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Another golden oldie that we can't let die...


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My 3 yr old used to put herself in timeout whenever she doesn't want to do something we ask him to. Pretty sure she beat the system.

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This is an illustrated map of all the direct contradictions in the bible.

I'm not talking doctrine interpretation or anything mirky like that. I'm talking about a holy book that says a man had two sons in one place and four sons in another.
It comes from the "Contradictions in the Bible" from Project Reason.

http://bibviz.com/#colorize:Crimson

Go to the bottom and it has tons of questions and when you click one it takes you to the contradiction "map" and gives you verse for verse.

Or you can believe this lunatic.




A truer statement was never written...


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