About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Friday, January 20, 2017

FRIDAY #2952

One Of My Very Own...


EMAIL:


Yes, I wear many hats...
Did you read the hat? I like it.
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Obama and Biden have really raised the bar for everyone else this Valentine's Day.
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How does the world see our election?

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The owner of my bar is a huge New York Giants fan. We made a bet on the Giants/Packers game and he lost.
He's wearing my GB jersey and cap. 
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I got an Obama thank you letter and you didn't...
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Michael Orchard. This man is a goddamned hero. He ran into a burning house to save a dog from the flames.
I mean sure, he was tripping balls on LSD and the fire wasn't real... but the fact that he THOUGHT it was and STILL risked his life... the hero we need right here. 
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I try and not post items that have been seen on TV or Facebook because I assume you all have seen it...unless I have something to say about it. This is the huge alligator that strolled across the golf course.
I like animals as next as the next guy, but should animals like that be allowed anywhere near humans?
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Democrats have stated that they have no intentions of helping the Republicans re-craft Obamacare; to "Let the Republicans own it." Does that sound like they give a fuck about you and your family's well-being?
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When my grandmother died she left instructions to have this song played at her funeral, and it actually made sense and was very sad.



I watched an Iranian horror movie and the special effects consisted of a person in a sheet running around an apartment. True. I swear.


I have asked countless individuals how I could download or otherwise get that exact font and no one can help me. Can any of you fine folk help me?

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Is coral the dumbest animal or the smartest rock?

WAR AND WARRIORS

People have to be talked into war.
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Trumps first day in office. 
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And there are many sprays that will work.
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The Slow Death 
World War One saw many horrors unleashed on the common soldier. One lesser spoken of horror is what some soldiers simply called the slow death. With millions of shells creating millions of craters and grinding the earth into a fine sludge, many soldiers would become stuck in craters filled with mud, sometimes 20, 30, or even 40 feet deep. There are accounts of soldiers sinking into such craters with their 80 pound packs and being unable to get out, sometimes even pulling others who tried to help into the mud as well. On many of these occasions, the trapped soldier would beg that he be shot, rather than face days of slowly encroaching suffocation. Other times, the mud simply swallowed them before they could request a quick death.
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And from the same war...
The Pool of Peace: A crater produced when the allied powers tunneled and blew up a mine beneath German forces during WWI. It is around 250 feet deep.
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Messines Ridge Explosion
Mining and planting explosives underneath enemy trenches had been a facet of WWI from very early in the war. The greatest of these mining operations was the one that took place on 7 June 1917. This operation involved 21-26 (depending on what you consider to be the same operation) separate mines filled with over 400 tonnes of explosives and is believed to be the largest non nuclear explosion ever made by man. Though only 19 mines blew, it is estimated that the Germans suffered around 25,000 casualties, with 10,000 instant deaths.
(those numbers seem a bit high)
[verification needed]


SUSPECT ADVERTISEMENTS


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Getting dick pics is like a cat giving you a dead mouse. You can see they are proud but you are never going to touch it.


Let's think about this...

This shit was common when I was growing up...

And you can bet your sweet ass that old black men tell stories of these horrors to their grandchildren.
Kind of hard to put the past behind you when such was a common occurrence.


AERIAL PHOTOGRAPHY: 
My New Best Friend


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People who believe in the lucky dead rabbit's foot totally miss the irony.


THINGS NOT PROCEEDING OPTIMALLY

Girl with early car seat belt, ca. 1950s... 
And yes people thought those breasts were attractive back then.
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Oh, hell no.
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Finally finished... 
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Actually, I kind of like this one... 
Although he could have just run it down the back of the downspout.
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Have you ever had a day this bad?
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I'm thinking it is more a case of very cold weather than very old oil.
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The Chinese electric train after a ride through smog. 
Or so I'm told.


Ladies and gentlemen, newly discovered OctopusFWB.



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Fiji and I have the same number of Olympic god medals.

 
MISCELLANEOUS

16th century boxwood carvings are so miniature researchers had to use X-ray to solve their mysteries. (click to embiggenize)
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As the world turn...
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When traffic comes to a complete stop in Germany, the drivers, by law, have to move towards the edge of each side creating an open lane for emergency vehicles. . . Why don't we have this rule in the states?
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Speaking of driving... 
Please don't do this or let anyone do this. That person's feet are directly on top of the airbag. Now imagine the pain if it flies out of there at about a hundred miles an hour. It could drive your kneecaps into you skull.
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Whilst translating a French poem, I came across the word 'analcoolique', I found this was not a French word, and it basically means butt chugging. According to the web site I found this out, it is incredibly dangerous, as the alcohol bypasses the liver etc to get into your body. Definitely not on my to do list. 

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3 comments:

Fardygardy said...

Blowing up armies from below: There is an excellent novel about the Pennsylvania militia (all coal miners) who attempted to blow up the entrenched Confederates during the US Civil War. The battle was called "the Battle of the Crater" and the story is fascinating. Read "Glory Enough for All" by Duane Schultz. I think it is out of print, so you have to look for it: https://www.amazon.com/Glory-Enough-All-Battle-Crater/dp/0312098170.

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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