About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Saturday, May 6, 2017

SATURDAY #3058

One Of My Very Own...
(It should read your wife instead of someone)


GREAT BALLS OF FIRE



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Food for thought...

That is, in fact, not true, but it wouldn't have surprise me.

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A mortar shell exploded during a training exercise in Afghanistan in July 2013, killing four Afghan soldiers and a U.S. Army photographer, Specialist Hilda Clayton. Clayton was training one of them in photojournalism, and both were shooting as the shell exploded. The photos were released by the U.S. Army today. Clayton's is below, the unnamed student's above. The photos were published with the permission of the Clayton family.


The Army said that "not only did Clayton help document activities aimed at shaping and strengthening the [US-Afghan] partnership but she also shared in the risk by participating in the effort."

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Remember the bride on the tailgate of a pickup? Now explained:

The bride was large enough, but with that BIG dress there was no way "they" could get into a regular vehicle. This I know because there was a rather large bide who lived in a small town I know well. On her wedding day she and her dress were too large for normal "to the church" transport. Her brother drove Frito truck, so he opened the back doors, helped her up and she rode standing up all the way to the church. When you got a big bride in a big dress you have to improvise.

The same nice lady who explained that to me also told me about the first red light her small town got on Main Street. She said that prior to that it was just a flashing yellow warning, then after it was converted to a red light, it would switch back to flashing yellow at 10pm. When she was a child one of their favorite things to do was run downtown in time to watch that red light switch to flashing yellow.


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1997: *waits 5 minutes for dial-up internet connection*
2017: MY CAR'S VOICE DOES NOT PLEASE ME!


THINGS THAT MIGHT BE TRUE


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How do you check your gender fluid? Is there a gauge or something? What do you know if it's low?


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If I could time travel, I'd grab Art major me in college & say, "Look, art will nourish your soul but take an appliance repair class."


PEOPLE BEHAVING UNADVISEDLY 

Rosie Ruiz, age 26, finishes first in the women’s division of the Boston Marathon with a time of 2:31:56 on April 21, 1980.
She was rewarded with a medal, a laurel wreath and a silver bowl; however, eight days later Ruiz is stripped of her victory after race officials learned she jumped into the race about a mile before the finish line.

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Robber in Colombia gets stopped movie style.

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The forever bachelor.

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Pirates vs armed security.
Notice return fire on railing.

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Karma for purse snatcher.

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Many people have a jar to collect change for vacation. I have one for bail money.


PEOPLE BEHAVING ADMIRABLY

11 year old chess prodigy Rameshbabu Praggnanandhaa defeats Grandmaster Axel Bachmann (with a 2645 rating) in 18 moves.


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Gardening digging gloves...
Speaking of gloves...

The only reason they can do that now is because of this invention.
The trick is that plastic tube that greatly improves the grip. Without them humans just don't have the grip strength to hold the bar.

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Old people like to get up early so they can go sit in chairs and fall back asleep.


LANGUAGE IS SO UTILITARIAN

You would think nowadays you wouldn't have to be reminded of this...

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Word on the street...

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Why have an affair when you can so easily ruin your marriage by remodeling the kitchen?


ODDNESSES

Trying too hard to be cool...

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This is my brand new favorite photo of all time.

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"Oh, Al."

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Woman Who Looks Like a Slut And Probably Is.
Do you have to get a degree for doing that?

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I really like these guys.

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Conceal carry?

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A new Suicide Bunny...
Rather subtle, that.

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[House Hunters episode]
HUSBAND: I'm a freelance hamster trainer 
WIFE: And I tune harmonicas part-time
HUSBAND: Our budget is $950K


EVERYBODY HAS TO BE FROM SOMEWHERE







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Blue whale devours a krill patch.

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Nice alligator rescuing his stranded friend.

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Transporting bamboo down the river Longai in Bangladesh.
Just like they have been doing for a thousand years.

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Solar power plant in Yinchuan, China.

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This took me much longer than it should have...
Jogging past the Washington Monument. 

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My imaginary friends had an imaginary friend. Mine was a difficult childhood.

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From Independent Film - Sand Castle.
I'll let this dialogue between an Iraqi engineer and a US soldier speak for itself.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

She may not need a degree to do that but if she's not careful they'll be down around her knees by the time she's fourty. No one will pay to watch 'em spin then!

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