About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Sunday, May 14, 2017

SUNDAY #3066

One Of My Very Own...





This reminds me of the time I fired my mother when she was investigating the case of "who ate all the cookies?"

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The ransomware attack was made possible by offensive cyber warfare tools stolen from our NSA. Think about that.


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So many women brag about finding chips in their cleavage... But if you really want to impress a man, you pull out a still edible donut.


RATHER FAMOUS PEOPLE

This is a young Clint Eastwood.

His son Scott Eastwood
No paternity test needed.

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What if...

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That time you try to kill a mosquito but just ate all the marijuana.

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The entire Baldwin family

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Let's not forget this wonderful lady...

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I keep a framed photo of glazed donuts in my studio in case clients want to see my loved ones.


BECOMING LESS STUPID 
ONE STEP AT A TIME

They call these tingers.
I wonder how close to the microwave you have to sit for that to happen.

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This upsets almost everyone...
In Europe almost all interstates have three lanes on each side. Trucks are not allowed in the left lane.

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When individualism isn't so important.
In America, at least one of them would be doing something stupid to get more attention than the others.

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[verification needed]

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This globe uses ambient light and the Earth’s magnetic field to rotate completely on its own.
Do covet.

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What a remarkable adaption.
Talking to my bartender about amazing animals and I brought up the duck. It can walk, swim, dive and fly. I find that remarkable.

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I don't think the average person is nearly alarmed enough over this disaster.

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Newscaster: Coming up, we'll examine ways to fix our broken healthcare system. But first, 5 minutes of prescription drug commercials.


THINGS GOING TO SHIT

Just another reason I don't go camping anymore.
...and that I don't live up north.

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What a wonderful compilation.
Somebody spent a lot of their time to make that, then shared it with us for free. Thanks compilation guy.

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Where is the justice?
Provocative sculpture by Dane Jens Galschiot. 

On a related topic, our government is preparing to give a tax cut to rich people. And what do we do? Absolutely nothing. We'll just print off some more money and grow our TWENTY TRILLION dollar deficit. $20,000,000,000,000.00. Now go take another look at that hour glass. $20T works out to about $200 per every person who ever lived. That disgusts me.

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I've worked on such things and can attest to the fact that shit like that happens all the time.

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Man reluctant to commit suicide is talked into it by asshole cop. 
(Please don't suggest I don't know it was reversed.)

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Most bags of sand live a tough life stopping floods. But some, the lucky ones, live a leisurely life tied to the basket of a hot air balloon.


LANGUAGE


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Need proof?

For the love of sanity, people! Just stop!
We all know it is used just so women can let a guy know how tight her vagina is.
But there's more...

Some people want to commandeer my language and change the definition of words, and no one asked me for input before the decision was made.

Comments left concerning that thought:
- How about everyone stop telling other people what words they can or cannot use. That would be good too.
- There is not a single word that I will or will not use because someone else says I can or cannot use it. 
- The idea that you think you are so important or sacred that you can control my speech is so offensive to me that if you choose to exercise that delusional sense of authority it may result in a punch in your mouth.
- As a certified Big Queer, no one in the lgbtq community gives a fuck, keep on showing your loved ones affection.
- I'm so tired of you idiots deliberately seeking out fringe shit that practically nobody believes just so you can feel offended by it.


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Help me out here, people. I don't get this cartoon.

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My single greatest fantasy is to wake up after getting enough sleep.


ART AND PHOTOGRAPHY

How unusual...

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The photographer's instructions must be priceless.

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What is this?
Could that be a mouth?

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It's also probably an excellent observation platform.

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I like stuff like this...


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Okay, probably not art, but I didn't have anywhere else to put it.

And it a REAL THING!

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I'm not sure what this means...

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I don't really pay much attention to politics so basically what I'm asking is, does anyone know if it's still illegal to sell kids on eBay?

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This really hit home...

Even as an art teacher I've seen other art teachers totally screw up what art is all about. Most art teachers insure relatively attractive children's art using a formula project: Every child does A, then B, etc and everyone gets something pretty yet 100% not art.

I, on the other hand, had wide open projects. There was no expected end product. I would teach you a skill and how the students used it was their business.


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

They're painting nothing. They need a room to paint.

MacGyver2016 said...

Regarding the Bizarro comic, the two painters are lacking walls and a ceiling to paint. They should obtain some of those, i.e. "get a room".

Obscure - I didn't get it at first.

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