About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

WEDNESDAY #3090

One Of My Very Own...


LA CUCARACHA


Why wouldn't one Facebook entry advocating violence be enough to get you deported?

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That child's middle name should have been "Show."

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Im so mad Trump pulled out of the Paris Climate Agreement that I might go read the Paris Climate Agreement.

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Venezuela
From a witnessing protester:
"They beat and robbed a lady and then flee like fucking cowards... same MO repeated all over the city including me. they took my helmet, mask, phone and camera. They are THUGS!" 



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1960s and 70s: We have to end a senseless war in Vietnam.
2017: Cheese smoked gouda is linked to racism.


ADVICE FROM SOME GUYS ON THE INTERNET


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Humans will not be fully evolved until everyone achieves the ability to maintain a constant speed while driving.


THINKING OUTSIDE THE BOX


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Alternative to traditional plates...

Bread served in container it was baked in.

Shrimp in a test tube.
I think you suck all of the contents into your mouth.

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Police catch a pigeon with 200 ecstasy pills hidden on its back.
That's actually a pretty good solution to the problem.

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But some times the box is there for a reason.
You should just fuck with language. I know language morphs as it should, but it morphs when millions of people start using a word and it just sort of catches on. No person or group can just demand that a change occur in a language. It has never worked like that and it never will work like that. Except for me inventing "Latexual" for a guy that prefers sex with life-size dolls. That should be added immediately.


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Lawyer: TELL ME WHY YOU STABBED HIM.
Me: Well, he responded to a text by calling and left me a voicemail.
[jurors gasp]
[Judge throws up]


STUFF I DIDN'T KNOW YESTERDAY
(If it's true)

Really?

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Latest view of Jupiter from the Juno spacecraft.

How long did it take for the scars of the Shoemaker-Levy comet fragments to fade away?
And are the black circles in the southern hemisphere from the new photo part of it?

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6K RESOLUTION GALAXY CLUSTER HUBBLE SPACE TELESCOPE IMAGE

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I've been waiting on this headline all of my life.

Could that be true?


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My wife's new phone has fingerprint recognition security technology and now she can't open her phone unless she's eating fried chicken.


JUST FOR LAUGHS

Subtle this...

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Leroooooooooy Jenkiiiiiiiiiins!

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 If you drink 6 RedBulls in less than an hour, they're not allowed to arrest you for stealing a bus. Read the can if you don't believe me.


THINGS WORTH THINKING ABOUT

An uncropped view of the famous Tank Unnamed Man photo from Tiananmen Square, Beijing, 1989
Soldiers are sworn to follow orders. If they fail to do so, they will be shot. So even though opening fire on your fellow citizens may be agonizing, they have no choice.
Maybe. But if they opt to not shoot, effectively joining the opposition, you have moved from protest to open rebellion.

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Why are we still hearing about these people?

I don't think they are even that stupid. I think they get more attention claiming a flat earth than they have ever gotten and are just riding the tide.
Here's my advice...

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My wife was discussing "random" traffic stops of young black men and how it would be a shame if an innocent young man like our friend, (name) since he was such a nice guy. I had to remind her that (name) was our weed guy.

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I guy posted that he had found this in a field.

I, also, found a pistol, but in the forrest.
Makes you wonder about how many there are just laying around undiscovered. And how many of them are discarded murder weapons?

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I have a friend who had to service the factory that makes rifles for the military. He said that there is no way to describe the number of weapons coming out of that one factory. He said the racks that held the finished weapons stretched for miles.


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Crazy how some people consider swimming to be a sport when the only alternative to it is drowning.
(it's like M.Phelps wins by drowning slower than the other swimmers)

THE CREATIVE PROCESS

This Average Guy Has Slept With More Celebrities Than Anyone Else
I found those delightful.
This next one not so much...

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I don't think this is art, but it is rather clever.

And so is this...

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We used to use this technique to make monoprints.
That's where you spray paint, drip paint etc onto water, then carefully lay a large piece of paper on top.

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This is a painting, of course, but I like it.

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I found a fellow traveler...
Artist put 15,000 coins on a path and filmed the delightful reactions.


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*her fingers tracing a scar on my arm
Her: How'd you get this?
Me: *softly I whisper* Are you familiar with....blackened fish?

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Don't think this could happen?
It happens every single time. Ask the Venezuelans.


2 comments:

MacGyver2016 said...

I must argue that soldiers, all military personnel, are sworn to follow all lawful orders.

Ralph Henry said...

I don't think they have that rule in China.

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