MONDAY #3385

VIEWER'S PHOTO

One Of My Very Own

EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

NEWSY BITS

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PHYSICAL OBJECTS THAT CONFUSE ME

Want to guess what this is made of?

Well, it started off as a wad of aluminum foil.

After hammering (a long, long time) and polishing, it looks like a solid steel ball.

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I've posted a couple of people doing this, but just noticed the sign says, Touch at your own risk.

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Use responsibly.

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????

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In America our guns have guns.

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I’m not wearing anything under my straightjacket.

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HUMAN BEINGS DOING THINGS I CAN'T OR WON'T DO

Why aliens don't visit us anymore.

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On the way to anger management class...

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Question: In Russia, does Putin provide each citizen with a bear, or do you have to go trap one yourself?

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And they live there voluntarily.

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An extraordinary transformation.

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Not in a million years...

There isn't enough money to get me to do this.

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There is a "Relax" guy on every team.

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Explain this to me, I dare you.

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Another weekend, another idiot drives their car into underground "streetcars only" tunnel in Toronto, on Queens Quay.

I thought that the entrance must not be marked properly, but...no.

Most common excuse? "I was just following my GPS." 

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When magicians babysit...

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Be like this guy.

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Looks a tad dangerous, but I think there was a malfunction in the lift stage or ladder.

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I'm not sure this is a proper way to handle this. I mean, he could have just received a call saying his child was in an accident or some such shit. No need to shame the guy until you find out the back story.

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In some neighborhoods this is the only way out of poverty.

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 [first day in prison]
Hold up, are you telling me this food is FREE?!?

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TALKING POINTS

We all accept this as the status quo, but I wonder if the same is true in other first world countries.

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Can we all just decide to stop this war on nipples?

Seriously, just take a deep breath and decide to give that one body part special powers.

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I would like to meet this man's girlfriend.

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Were you insulted by that nipple?

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Other than alcohol and nicotine I am not addicted to drugs. I found this enlightening.

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Everything needs a name...

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I counsel that at every opportunity.

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My favorite sexual position is pretty much any of them. I’m just glad to be involved. Hell, I’ll just sit over in the corner and watch.

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JUST THE FACTS, MA'AM

DNA evidence proves that women were Viking warriors. DNA analysis of the bones found in a Viking Age grave in Birka, Sweden reveals that the warrior had no Y chromosomes. The bad ass warrior woman's bones were found laid alongside a whole ass armory: a set of armor, a sword, armor-piercing arrows, a battle knife, an axe, a spear, two shields, two entire horses, and a full set of game pieces and a gaming board. 

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A 100-year-old fruitcake from the doomed British Terra Nova Expedition in 1910 was discovered at Cape Adare. The fruitcake was described as looking and smelling 'almost edible,' marking the first time in history that a fruitcake was nearly considered appetizing. 

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A restoration that is faithful to the architectural integrity is a good thing.

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I've never seen this before.

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I remember that clearly.

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Ireland

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11 different brands of AA batteries, tested in identical flashlights.

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Want to run away from the truth together?

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Most believers in the west believe that this is just silly, but they have no problem believing this non-sense...

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