About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Thursday, May 17, 2018

THURSDAY #3430

One Of My Very Own

EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com





FUN WITH LANGUAGE


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Was my dating strategy for years.

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All things Ralph...

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Ovary-acting?

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Plot Twist: His big brother bullied him.

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My wife has literally everything in her purse. Today I needed tissues, a hammer, peanut butter and dice and she had 2 of each.

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A LITTLE BIT OF THIS
A LITTLE BIT OF THAT

I should have thought of that.

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A comment suggested that it happened because he was going too fast.

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I'm not a fan of squirrels, so I thought that hilarious.

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The Akhal-Teke is a horse breed from Turkmenistan, where they are a national emblem. 
They have a reputation for speed and endurance, intelligence, and a distinctive metallic sheen. The shiny coat of palominos and buckskins led to their nickname "Golden Horses". These horses are adapted to severe climatic conditions and are thought to be one of the oldest existing horse breeds. There are currently about 6,600 Akhal-Tekes in the world, mostly in Turkmenistan and Russia, although they are also found throughout Europe and North America. Akhal was the name of the line of oases along the north slope of the Kopet Dag mountains. It was inhabited by the Tekke tribe of Turkomans.

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He must have gone to the William Shatner school of acting.
I don't understand his fight posture which exposes his entire fragile underbelly.

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Is this a video game?

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Every person on their first hit a marijuana.

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Every wonder how this was painted?

Well, he worked with the tide.
But did the wall have time to dry before he applied the paint? It did seem to deteriorate almost immediately - first photo.

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How to eat: boiled eggs
Of such things nightmares are born.


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Nothing says how messed up my family was like my little sister putting her head in an Easy-Bake-Oven & my brother asking me if I taught her.

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JUST PLAIN GOOD IDEAS


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When I was in the 7th grade my family moved into a house that a man had built himself. Every surface - including that ceiling - of every room was scorched pine. We found one of these in the barn.
Scorched wood is wonderful in that it will never have to be painted, nail holes are almost impossible to see and it will last forever.

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Automatic takoyaki flipping cooker.
That is genius.

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Growing up in the South, we did that every Summer. We used June Bugs that had an amazing amount of endurance.

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I think I've shown you this before.

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This is a bedroom ceiling for a guy's daughter. He used a template to match the night sky over their house.

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Would you do this?


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Wife: I got a new dress for date night!
Me: That's sexy! I like the zipper going down the front.
She: That is the garment bag, you idiot.

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PEOPLE MOST LIKELY MORE FAMOUS THAN YOU AND I


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Every marriage in the world summed up in one song lyric.

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Synchronized swimming from underwater.

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I wonder how many people will get that.

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Before she morphed into a comedian.


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An app that tells you if there’s anyone at the grocery store you might have to make small talk with.

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