FRIDAY #3746

One Of My Very Own

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ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com 

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AWKWARD LANGUAGE

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A 28-year-old woman whose hobbies include sewing, baking and ballroom dancing would make a Suffragette vomit. 
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Revelers at the Carolina Cup Race have complained that horses are getting in the way of their drinking. 
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Moms ever so grateful to Folio Olio for parenting tips
Mothers around the world have thanked Folio Olio for pointing out that they are doing every single fucking thing wrong. Whether working full-time, staying at home with their kids, single, married, young, old or gay, the blog is always there, reminding them that any perceived failings in their children are entirely their fault.

Mother-of-three Emma Bradford said: “I work part-time, which means I’m guilty of both abandoning my children like a feminazi and smothering them like a helicopter parent. Obviously, I don’t want my children to be obese, like a bad mother, but nor should I be ferrying them to sports clubs all the time like an obsessive tiger mom living for her children’s achievements. Basically whatever I do will ruin my children and I’ll be to blame. Meanwhile, fathers are required to do nothing, and if I ever ask then he’ll have an affair. So thanks, Folio Olio for making me a better mother. By which I mean go fuck yourself.”
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It's a bakery!
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Therapy is nice, but screaming FUCK at the top of your lungs for 10 seconds is a lot faster and cheaper.

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HUMAN EXERTION

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Every time there is any talk about milk, I unnecessarily add "not breast milk" just to make everyone uncomfortable.

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PEOPLE NOT LIKE YOU AND ME

 

You gotta respect his spunk.

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Oh pleez!
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A man meets the daughter of a man he killed in Vietnam. "Please forgive me."

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Soldier receives his mounted helmet that took a 7.62 round at 20 feet while wearing it. 
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Oh, let's help the poor lady...

What kind of learning curve do those people have...or not have?
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Human steering

 Unbelievable short clip.
https://imgur.com/gallery/Wdu28Xj
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The bird is roasted for eight minutes and then plucked. The consumer then places the bird's feet first into their mouth while holding onto the bird's head. The ortolan is then eaten whole, with or without the head and the consumer spits out the larger bones. The traditional way French gourmands eat ortolans is to cover their heads and face with a large napkin or towel while consuming the bird. The purpose of the towel is debated. Some claim it is to retain the maximum aroma with the flavor as they consume the entire bird at once, others have stated "Tradition dictates that this is to shield – from God’s eyes – the shame of such a decadent and disgraceful act", and others have suggested the towel hides the consumers spitting out bones.
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HUMAN MAMMARIES

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THE PEOPLE I HATE MOST

I put those people in the same group as people who believe this is real...


But there are rays of sanity sunshine.

[verification needed]

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Autocorrect has yet to figure out how often I swear and how rarely I discuss ducks.

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RATHER SPECIAL ANIMALS

60-year-old Super Tusker

The elephant she told you not to worry about.

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The difference between dogs and cats.

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I don't mean to interrupt people but I just randomly remember things and get really excited. I'm sorry.

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GOOD OR BAD IDEAS - YOU DECIDE

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 If it works it's not stupid.
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You must respect their ingenuity.

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 At first I called bullshit.

Then I looked it up.
https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/mbkxx8/school-nurses-can-now-give-kids-medical-marijuana-in-colorado-vgtrn
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 Hahahabannanaha!

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It's called a concussion and most of the time it is easily avoidable. 
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Talk about your mixed messages! 
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Who cleans the shit out of her panties? 
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