One Of My Very Own
I think the collapse of the condo in Miami was due to a sinkhole under a key part of the foundation. We shall see.
There is a giant orb in the sky we aren't supposed to look at and we all go about our lives not looking at it like that's NORMAL.
FUN WITH LANGUAGE
I love daft dialogue.
He should be a redshirt.
Who am I to disagree with?
AIBOHPHOBIA: The irrational fear of palindromes.
I KNEW IT! I've been telling you for years and now the PROOF!
Water? You mean like out of the toilet?
*But Coke also bottles the water at basically the cost of the plastic bottle.
Ginger you racist pig.
The easiest way to become a millionaire in space is to start off as a billionaire.
THINGS I NEED EXPLAINED
My daughter told me that my grandson was really into Star Wars. I asked him why they used fancy swords when they had laser weapons and such. He said that Jedis could use the force to divert the lasers but nothing could stop a lightsaber except another lightsaber.
He just turned six.
What could have possibly motivated that sidewalk configuration?
Please don't do that...I beg you. Nobody deserves that much attention.
But when I noticed my fuckup I always go back and correct it.
Earth has finally attained popular recognition for its fifth ocean, with a decision by the National Geographic Society to add the Southern Ocean around Antarctica to the four it recognizes already: the Atlantic, Pacific, Indian, and Arctic oceans.
How will you know when you exit one ocean and enter another?
Had you been a passenger, would you have closed your eyes until it was safely out of danger? I think I would have.
Just something else to think about.
Fox News is the one who still insists that this historical photograph has been doctored.
What harm can they do you ask?
Its lowness to the ground is why I sold my last convertible. I'm just too old to climb out of a vehicle.
But wouldn't it have occurred to that guy to put his legs out first?
By the way, the last NYT crossword had the word "vamp" as an answer to the clue "extemporize" and I can't remember ever reading it before.
What a wonderfully unique wall treatment but is there a word for it? I mean if you are talking to you brick contractor how do you let him know what you want?
Another modification from my friend, Danny.
Well done, sir. Well done.
I once made a joke that there were so many people climbing Mt. Everest that they were opening a Starbucks on the summit.
Yes, but can they do it with dicks?
- Asking for a friend.
I once had a chandelier made from an old Model T wheel rim. They had wooden spoke you know.
I once approached the owner of a piano store with an offer to paint a huge piano keyboard on the side of his building and he more or less wanted to know if I had lost my fucking mind.
Those women are nuts.
The bitch abandoned her chicks at the first signs of great peril.
I never knew there was such a device. I always thought they cut them with a special saw.
I taught him everything he knows.
The father of a friend of mine told him that he would buy him a car when and if he graduated high school and when the time came my friend chose the family car - a Lincoln just like this one only white.
Notice the suicide doors.
That has got to be one of the most terrifying weather events. Even being that far from it would panic me.
It looks so...fragile.
You would think somebody would think of salvaging the windows, windshield, and such to sell as novelty items.
Just another reason not to be rude to your waitstaff...seriously.
I totally agree.
I have told this story countless times and more often than not I am not believed.
If you want to rid yourself of hiccups try drinking a few swallows of water upside down with the lip of the glass on your upper lip. Look at the illustration and do it exactly like that. DO NOT HURRY. For decades it has worked for me every single time. I swear.