About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Sunday, July 4, 2021

SUNDAY #4575

 One Of My Very Own


EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com



I'm southern bred and raised and I consider the whole unfortunate incident an embarrassment.




Climate change - we need to snip it in the butt.



It looks good but...

As a son of the South, I know what a tomato is supposed to taste like. If you don't have homegrown tomatoes - and Duke's Mayonnaise - you might as well put that bread away.




You will never learn how to do anything meaningful without lots and lots of mistakes. I'm an artist - I know.



Backstory damnit! We demand backstory.



At the Morton Arboretum in Illinois.

Note human for scale.


The same people who think that masks, vaccines, even social distancing are an infringement of their rights are okay with that. Go fucking figure. Further, they would shit in their pants if Biden mandated the same thing.


The surface of this iron meteorite became molten as it entered Earth's atmosphere.

I would stare at that all afternoon.


How many times have you heard a conservative lament about the government taking all of our guns...And. It. Never. Happened. 

What kind of learning curve is that?


No, the other one...


"Because that's the way we've always done it."

That's the crux of the homophobes' reasoning. Their grandfathers hated queers. Their fathers hated queers. And, by God, I hate them too.

I can't think of one single reason that homosexuals should be treated any differently than any other American. Not one.

If they make you "uncomfortable" that's you're failing, not their's.




Carrie Fisher asks women, man talks, shut the fuck up I wasn't talking to you.




My friend, Jack, attended a conference on health in which everyone was given a name tag of a disease and a booklet explaining that disease. Then they explained that disease to other attendees. His was  Chlamydia.




Rocky Mountain oysters - the original sack lunch.




One of the first funny images on the internet was a woman with a fish's eyes lining up with her eyes similar to that. I looked for a long time without finding it.

Days later: So I went looking for it again. I found this...

Which I thought wonderful despite the murderous beast depicted.

Then I found something very similar to what I was looking for.

And finally, I found one of the first images I ever stole from the internet.

You're welcome.


That took me much too long to understand.


Labs gotta Lab...

I once watched a Lab break the ice on a puddle and then wallow in it.


Happy dog...

His buddy has seen this shit before.


The typical pattern for Paramatachia spiders.

"Other spiders in the same family (Desidae) make similar webs, like Badumna and Matachia. All can be found in Australia/NZ."

Seems very efficient.


Vibrations of croaking frog...



If you are injured on an alien planet ask for a veterinarian, not a doctor. Their doctors know only the species-specific care of the natives. Their vets have a broad spectrum of knowledge to make sense of your unusual anatomy.




Everything you ever needed to know about the need for periodic driving tests...

Everything you ever needed to know about people who don't get the vaccine because they have a "supreme immune system"...

The "superior race", indeed.


Everything you ever needed to know about fat girls running in flip-flops...

The Law Of Inverse Shoeing - the more likely a person requires structurally stable footwear, the more likely they will be in flip-flops.


Everything you ever needed to know about drunk skateboarders...

Everything you ever needed to know about muscle memory...

Everything you ever needed to know about guys with trampolines...


Everything you ever needed to know about highly - some may say insanely motivated women...


Everything you ever needed to know about girls who grew up older brothers...

Everything you ever needed to know about the birth of inadequacy...

Everything you ever needed to know about gamers...

Everything you ever needed to know about teenage boys showing off in front of teenage girls...




I would like to meet that guy and ask him what he took and does he have any more left.









It seems that every time I try to do anything new with technology it ends up being much harder than it was explained to me.

I came across another stack of old photographs and needed them scanned onto a memory stick to transfer to my computer and from my computer to share with you fine folks. So, I went to a copy shop and they said I could copy them myself for 50¢ each or they would do them for $1 each. So I asked for a tutorial and discovered that it took over a minute per photo. That equated to two hours of my time so I paid to have them do it.

Mistake #1 was that they came back PDF. Now guess what format my blog host will not accept. That's right PDF. So I had to take a screenshot of each and every image.

Mistake #2 was that almost all the photos had been placed on the copier crooked so the screenshots were very awkward.

Now let's continue...

I was a full-time school teacher and painted murals every chance I got - scheduling out-of-town jobs on my frequent holidays. But when there was a lull in the mural business I liked to make toy boxes.

I made many toy boxes out of pallet wood. I liked this one so much I made a coffee table out of it for my sunporch.

I salvaged the free wood a little differently than most people. I plugged my saw into a 12vdc to 110vac converter in my truck and cut all the boards on-site.

Here's an assortment of my pallet wood boxes.

I liked to make each one of them a little different so that each customer got a one of a kind. And I sold a shit load of them.

Of course, being a painter I painted most of them.

A rare two-compartment box.

The hardware on that box came from several old trunks that had been left on the dirt floor in a garage long enough to rot out. I stacked them up and burned them then sifted through the ashes for the hardware. I still have many of them.

I also liked to vary the shape.

This one is built with an angled top to look like the huge jewelry box was ajar.

I wasted two of my cherished brass handles on each end of that one.

I usually put the kid's name somewhere on the box.

These are all children's books but I remembered this box when designing my grandson's box.

I painted on the top of this one as if I was on the front page of Newsweek. All the hardware and leather straps are painted on.

I filled that box with every novel and short story I have ever written and delivered it to my daughter's house for my grandson to read when he gets older.

I had forgotten that the original had my installation "I Said Left, Harold" depicted on the front of an art magazine.

I once displayed my wares at a pre-Christmas expo at the fairgrounds and sold every box. Do you know what that told me?

That I wasn't charging enough money. I immediately doubled my prices.


Larry said...

I like the hand with the frozen water bottles, subtle that......

Ralph Henry said...

I need the image number or I have no idea to what you are referencing.

Anonymous said...

In your public service announcement (no number) there is a frozen hand on the shelf below the bottles.

Anonymous said...

Those toy boxes are incredible and will be passed on to future generations.

Anonymous said...

There wasn't one. It was in the section near the end.

Ralph Henry said...

Did by chance did the section near the end have a title?

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