WEDNESDAY #1742

Interactive world map that lets you simulate releasing millions of rubber ducks in the ocean, then watch where the tide would take them.
>>>>> CLICK HERE <<<<<
See how long it takes you to find the Pacific Trash Pile that just sits there.

 To me that sound says "I have a small dick. I have a small dick......" But I would never think of telling him that.

This may be one of the funniest things I've ever seen on the internet...

I have no idea where it came from.

People tell me that there is a unique, almost spiritual feeling you get while sailing. I don't doubt it...

Somewhere, some time, a man just thought the stone arch up and it changed the world, and we don't even know his name...

Vietnam War Memorial: 39,996 on the Wall were just 22 or younger;

8,283 were just 19 years old;

The largest age group, 33,103 were 18 years old; 
12 soldiers on the Wall were 17 years old;

5 soldiers on the Wall were 16 years old;

One soldier, PFC Dan Bullock was 15 years old.

997 soldiers were killed on their first day in Vietnam.

1,448 soldiers were killed on their last day in Vietnam.

Meanwhile in Australia...

This evening I found myself sitting at a bar next to two rednecks…the trailer trash meth lab kind, not your normal eating opossum, help your neighbor sort…as long as the neighbor ain’t black. (and every Southerner knows the deference) Anyway, the first guy ran up a tab until he ran out of money so he told his friend it was time he opened a tab. The bartender asked his name, but before he could respond his friend said…and I quote…”Early. He’s got one of them three syllable names.” And as he pronounced it, it surely did.

There's an 'I', 'eye' joke in here that I can't seem to find...

Violence in America is confusing to most people.
First, the vast majority of crime happens in large cities, and in those cities it's just certain neighborhoods that rack up the numbers, and further, it is just certain blocks in those neighborhoods.
The map below shows the edge of the ghetto. Your chances of getting mugged in the middle of the non-ghetto neighborhood in blue is very low, but in some blocks of the ghetto it approaches 100%...

People fear things not by reason, but by news coverage. Your chances of being shot in a theater is less than being struck by lightning. Dying from a terrorist attack far less than that.
As a matter of fact, we live in the safest time ever in the history of mankind. Yet we fear more. 
Turn off the TV. Take a deep breath and live a happy productive life....unless you live in the ghetto, then you are more or less fucked.
And then I found this...but not sure if it's real or somebody is just fucking with us....

America: Where people drive electric scooters in grocery stores because they’ve eaten too much.

The next time the waiter asks, "How do you want your steak?" You deadpan, "Marinated in the tears of vegans."

I used to think that people like these can not be made fun of enough. Now I think they deserve not a wit of our attention...not even ridicule...

Think this will work? It would have to cut perfectly...

Note the third photo from the top on the left. Had this piece been taken first, then the next person could see that the hole on the left was empty.

Would someone let me know if this is true...

I've actually given a person an insult that were so bad that they cried and begged you to take it back.

I keep repeating, but there are a whole bunch of clever people out there...

Nowadays nobody takes anything seriously. Seriously.

The Japanese really know how to pull a prank...

When my Netflix pauses downloading at 97%...

A gift card is a great way to say, “Go buy your own fucking present.”

You really should read that in a Russian peasant accent.

Mona Lisa painted with paint balls...

Whatever.

Recognize this guy?

Here's a hint...

He was in a movie I watched -"Into the White"- about a British crew and a German crew who both got shot down over the freezing cold Norwegian mountains at the same time. He did a great job...seriously.

Anyway, here's Rupert Grint taking a shit...something I never thought I'd see...

I'm often amazed why some foods from some countries are tremendously popular and other countries don't even get a notice. What's up with that?

And to think, all over the world they think McDonald's is American food.

Boy, this is a tough call. I would really hope someone would put me out of my misery, but why the hell didn't he just give her an overdose?

Fact: You would get laid more if you lowered your standards.

It doesn’t matter where you go in life as long as you keep a little buzz on.

Men need a universal hand signal for “wife doesn’t know about that.”

I hate sex in the movies. The wife and I tried it once…seat doubled up, spilled all our shit and my back went out.

Who came up with the definition of definition?

You can't imagine how long I spent trying to figure out if the caption should be that or 'Put the fucking food in the bowl'......I need a hobby.

How to know for certain that those smiles are fake...

All I want is to eat the chicken that is smarter than other chickens.

 Want to try to guess what these are?

Tattoos removed from dead prisoners.

For every idiot there is an equal and opposite idiot.

My wife asked me if her voice made her butt look fat.

I have never learned how to swear in French.

"My mom is obsessed with elephant fantasies."

"Well, pull yourself together, Hilda."

Now is a good time to wait until later.

Ran into this several places and STILL fear it's shopped...

"But.....but...I've only been away two fucking hours!"

Bowling alleys smell like not diplomas.

What's with the red tennis court?

AND THEN THERE'S THIS...
or WHY GOING TO WAR IS A LITTLE IFFY...
(this is not a film)

Nayirah Testimony refers to the controversial testimony given before the non-governmental Congressional Human Rights Caucus on October 10, 1990, by a female who provided only her first name, Nayirah. In her emotional testimony, Nayirah stated that after the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait she had witnessed Iraqi soldiers take babies out of incubators in a Kuwaiti hospital, take the incubators, and leave the babies to die. Though reporters did not then have access to Kuwait, her testimony was regarded as credible at the time and was widely publicized. It was cited numerous times by United States senators and the president in their rationale to back Kuwait in the Gulf War.

Her story was initially corroborated by Amnesty International and testimony from evacuees. Following the liberation of Kuwait, reporters were given access to the country and found the story of stolen incubators unsubstantiated. However, they did find that a number of people, including babies, died when nurses and doctors fled the country.

In 1992, it was revealed that Nayirah's last name was al-Ṣabaḥ (Arabic: نيره الصباح‎) and that she was the daughter of Saud bin Nasir Al-Sabah, the Kuwaiti ambassador to the United States. Furthermore, it was revealed that her testimony was organized as part of the Citizens for a Free Kuwait public relations campaign which was run by Hill & Knowlton for the Kuwaiti government. Following this, al-Sabah's testimony has largely come to be regarded as wartime propaganda.