FRIDAY #1917

THERE WILL BE POST BOTH SATURDAY AND SUNDAY...WEIRD SHIT...HOPE YOU LIKE IT.

Headline of the day:

Indian police failed to act on eight years of complaints after forgetting computer password

They are still finding these in Europe...this one being Soviet - still wearing his helmet...

Don’t insert “Right?” in your sentences. It’s like you are begging me for affirmation and it’s demeaning. You have an opinion? It doesn’t need instant affirmation. I would hope you would like a thoughtful, honest response…not an immediate, worthless nod.

I just had a conversation about sports that centered around cavemen. I wondered aloud how early one primitive man tossed a discarded bone and it bounced inside a discarded skull across the cave (or whatever) and his cavemate tried and failed to duplicate his feat and the first guy laughed and then...it....was....GAME ON!

This device MUST be necessary to teach these children something...

...but other than keep your head up, I have no idea what that reason is.

They used to use acid to remove freckles...

 I find it appalling that people suffer so much because they don't measure up to a "norm" that was established by people who want to sell you something.

 What can I say? I would like to do the same experiment for people who say god "talked" to them.

Dog found and rescued...

I learned something disturbing yesterday. One of my bar owner friends was visiting me at another bar when he noticed that the liquor bottles had an unusual pour spout on the top. When he asked about them the bartender showed him that it was just a golf tee stuck down in the tubular top. I asked why they would do that (thinking it might have been evaporation avoidance) and was told that it was to keep the fruit flies out of the liquor.
With further conversation I learned that NEVER had ANYONE heard of fruit flies entering a liquor bottle through the spout, then dying. But when you pour a drink there they are floating on the top, freaking out patrons.
I discretely asked the bar owner if he just filtered out the fruit flies and put the liquor back in the bottle, and he said that he did, in fact, do just that. Further, he said that the fruit flies had a preference for the more expensive brands.

Fact?

 Who the fuck knows?

I hate it when my wife accuses me of not caring about whatever the fuck she was talking about.

It must be in their genes...

My hits from the Ukraine have gone through the roof. All I can assume is that there is some sort of filter that scans blogs for their key words. So, let's test it.
I will pick other countries and see if just by mentioning its name my hits from that country increase. I will have to pick countries with no known hits to Folio Olio.
Chile
Latvia
Albania
Pago Pago
Luxembourg
Morocco

OOMVO...

I miss you like a person on a cleanse misses their sanity.

Found a Cheeto that looks like a guy masturbating...

What must they be thinking...

I barely remember what my wife looks like covered in chocolate syrup and whipped cream.

 Well....duh!

Yes, beauty is all around you....if you will just look...

Best headline of the day...

 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAHA!

Have no idea if this is true, but it made me smile...

“I’m going to save the rest of my beer,” said no one ever.

If you are not judging others and complaining on a regular basis, you’re not using the Internet right.

Congratulations to gay Arizonians on still being allowed to eat where people hate you.

 I've talked to several people (two of the ex-cons) who were high school drop-outs. They all say something similar to: "The teachers didn't like me."

I was a teacher. Teachers don't have time to not like you. You were an asshole....just admit it.

 I found it interesting that with all the shit I've done in my life, only recently did I take a ride in an ambulance.

Only quality sight gags on this blog, folks...

 If my dog looked like this, I would be arrested.

Early on I discovered the secret to a happy relationship…low expectations.

Finnish tire manufacturer Nokian Tyres has created a winter tire concept that features retractable studs. The retractable stud system---Nokian says it is the first of its kind---allows a driver to extend the studs during winter conditions and retract them on clear roads, all by the push of a button.

A true friend will rearrange your body after you die of auto-erotic asphyxiation before your loved ones discover it.

How about we deal with human trafficking first?

Must be a Monday...

Please stop calling me “Cracker”…the correct term is Saltine-American.

And then Satan said, “Put the alphabet in math.”

Then humanity added the Greek alphabet as well.

And even Satan raised an eyebrow and left to study art.

"Fuck you, Ronaldo...."

I drink so I can have something, other than poor judgment, on which to blame my actions.

This looks fake, but it real...in Florida of all places...

THERE WILL BE POST BOTH SATURDAY AND SUNDAY...WEIRD SHIT...HOPE YOU LIKE IT.