THURSDAY #1986

 Good fucking question.

I have never heard a good argument about why so many scientists would lie...with peer review it would mean one after another is in on some kind of grand conspiracy...

 Seriously thinking about getting a tattoo...

I wanted white letters with a gray shadow, but was told that white ink (for whatever reason) fades rather quickly.
Any of you know anything about that?

Got invited to a welcome home party for a waitress at my bar after a prolonged absence. She confessed that on that very day she had driven on her FIRST DIRT ROAD! The child was from Chicago.
Everyone laughed...being all Southerners, but I wouldn't let it end like that and explained that if we Southerners went Upnorth, we would probably see stuff for the first time.....like old men sleeping on the sidewalk...shivering...and ignored....for weeks.
A good time was had by all.

The only thing I like about trips to the barber is when he dusts me off, like I’m an ancient artifact.

I detest the cutesy names restaurants give their meals.

 I agree. Pick your battles carefully.

I find it funny that no one thinks that laugh lines are funny.

I forgot why I thought this was important...

 I know that people make more money in places with a high cost of living...say New York. But that doesn't apply to federal employees. A postman makes the same whether he works in New York or Mississippi. Bummer that.

Dolphins are often ranked among the smartest members of the animal kingdom. They engage in complex forms of communication, may recognize themselves in mirrors, can understand sign language, and can learn to poke an underwater keyboard to request toys to play with.

Now it has been documented that Dolphins use sponges as tools to snag food they could not otherwise grab.

Rather eerie images from China's panda project...

My daughter always wore glasses when she did math because it helped her with da-vision.

Dan Greding was installing a roadside parking sign warning motorists of a 75-minute parking limit when a Santa Barbara cop gave him a ticket for parking for more than 75 minutes. "I said, 'But I'm putting these signs up,'" Greding told KEYT. "And he says, 'Then you should know you can't park here more than 75 minutes.' I said, 'Well, I haven't put the sign up yet, so you can't write me a ticket.'" He fought the ticket and lost. He's appealing.

A web-based hitchhiking platform has been successfully tested in the Lawrence, Kansas area. Now, it's expanding to the rest of the country.

I assume you help with the gas.

Help me out with this. America provides food and healthcare to people all over the world, but we balk at providing it for our own people....?

I wonder if any co-pilot had his pilot say, "Autopilot Engaged" and reply, "Good for him. I hope everything works out for them." 

I love shit like this..

My young daughter once asked me why pizza tasted so good and I told her it was because it was the only triangular food....and she believed me....for a while.

Looks like the little fellow just learned a very important life lesson...

It ain't fair.

My daughter came home from her first sex ed class furious with me. She said, "You lied to me. You said that if I had sex before I was 16 that my boyfriend would die!"
I said, "He will."

"I was like..." has replaced "I said..." in the English language. But I am cool with that.

That tax return you just got was lending money to the government interest free.

One Of My Very Own...

"My opinion is to avoid ghost sex in the same way one would avoid sex with any stranger."

Despite decades of taking measurements, scientists cannot agree on how long neutrons live. Neutrons are stable inside atoms, but on their own they decay in about 15 minutes, more or less, into a few other particles. Exactly how much more or less is the sticking point. Each experiment seems to yield a different answer.

Jack Lemmon at a bar...

 If I were sitting on the stool beside him, I would talk about ANYTHING except his acting.

It takes 8 minutes and 17 seconds for light to travel from the Sun to the Earth, but only two seconds for me to light this blunt.

Meet Street Art pioneer, Dan Witz...

 He paints panels in his studio...

Then mounts them around the city...

And they are magnificent...

He does not "just" do people behind grates. It is just his latest subject....

 He is one of the best in the business, but he does not seek notoriety (Banksy) and prefers to work anonymously. I admire his work very, very much.

Nikola Tesla As A Swimming Instructor.... 

You're argument is invalid.

Anton Purisma has launched a civil rights suit against an airport Au Bon Pain restaurant; he's asking for $2,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000. That would be two undecillion dollars.

Jesus fell over.....again...

Most people have no idea what Art is...

Sadly, most people have no idea what Art is. I truly believe that.

When old man is put in an Assisted Living Facility, management should assign a woman to give him a handjob whenever he wants one. That’s what I would call Assisted Living.

When in Naples (from left to right: money, past times, affirmation, stupid, good, wait a moment, to walk backward, to steal, horns, to ask for.)

Ever wonder what a lion looks like after one of those frequent run-ins with a water buffalo?

He was rescued and sewn up by vets.

 Bullshit! Why are so many people so stuck on keeping things the way they are? Cursive can be learned...I really don't give a shit. But not on school time. Look at the evaluations. We don't have time to teach them to read, much less write. Use the hours and hours of cursive practice for something that really matters.

As not a cat lover, I offer an alternate opinion...