The first thing out of my wife's mouth after I asked her to marry me was (*), "Just think of the tax breaks!"
(* I so very much wanted to put "my dick" right there but feared it would confuse you)
Damn!
CROSSWORD CLUE: Pop stars?
That is exactly the way it was written. The question mark normally means there is something odd about the answer. I'll go ahead and give you the S since the question requires a plural.
__ __ __ __ S
No misunderstanding this body language...
Hint #1: __ __ V __ S
When science goes too far...
I once worked in a building where the Repair Room was right next to the Break Room and I was the only person in the building who thought that was funny.
I hate
when there's no toilet paper left and I have to ask the guy in the next stall
to come wipe me.
An isolated tribe in the Amazon rainforest along the Upper
Envira River in Brazil is willingly making contact with the outside world,
"a momentous and potentially tragic step." Members of the tribe
approached Brazilian government scientists on June 29th and asked for help.
Hint #2: __ __ V A S
One reason the tribe now needs assistance is the logging of "their" jungle...
You would be no fool to guess DIVAS. I, and probably you, don't really consider pop stars divas, but remember the question mark. But, alas, you would be wrong.
(Lara, the ball is on your side of the court)
One Of My Very Own...
SOLUTION: NOVAS.....pop stars...HAHAHAHAHA!!
(Dictionary tells me novas is first preference for plural over novae)
Before you pick a tattoo off the wall, please consider employing a real tattoo artist for something unique...
Taj Mahal was built for a wife who died following the
birth of her 14th child. The sanskrit "Taj Mahal" roughly translates into the English "Clown Car Vagina".
When I was young I carved numerous knives. I still can't believe that my mom didn't save even one of them.
I like unusual people. They make me curious and curiosity
is a good thing.
Run!
Did you notice the Chick-fil-A cup?
Another accident at the light saber factory...
You know that show “Teen Mom” or if you’re from the South, just “Mom”.
If I’m eating cereal with a teaspoon, don’t offer me a big
one. I’m having a fabulous time and know exactly what I’m doing.
See anything odd about this?
Have you ever been sent to the store for milk, but instead came back with novelty cookie cutters? Well, now everything my wife and I eat is
shaped like little dinosaurs. She said I was “amazing”.
Oh, look, somebody needs attention...
Last night I found out that clowns really, really don’t like being
touched.
This is one of the damnest things I could have imagined...
Sometimes NASA comes up with incredibly
complex solutions to extremely complex problems. Other times they come up with
the simplest ones. And then there's the case of how to test the stability of an
entire Saturn V rocket, which is what you can see in this hilarious video from
1966.
From my nephew's garden....
He's the one who also has bee hives.
People usually need a couple of drinks just to get through
a conversation with me.
These Ruby Roman grapes were sold for ¥550,000
(roughly $4,000 USD) at an auction over the weekend in Ishikawa Prefecture,
Japan to be served at a wedding. That works out to about $180 per grape.
How is it that I've never heard of these?
A series of square, straight and ringlike ditches scattered
throughout the Bolivian and Brazilian Amazon were there before the rainforest
existed, a new study finds. These human-made structures remain a mystery: They
may have been used for defense, drainage, or perhaps ceremonial or religious
reasons.
OOMVO...
I am no stranger to Plan B.
I've long supported this...
Ever wonder about the normal day of famous people?
Want to fuck with people? Take a bite from the side of the corn dog when you get it.
Really want to fuck with people? Tell the girl a Subway's that she made the sandwich to fast and you want a replacement.
If people could just stop doing stupid things in the name
of god, that would be great.
No matter how bad your day seems, just remember, someone
has to clean the bathroom at Taco Bell.
(can we assume that it's because they drive at 15mph?)
Try to solve that riddle if you can with the logical conclusion. Answer later.
You might want to do some research on this. $12B seemed to be the total costs and I say it's worth it...
Yes, men have feelings. Like right now I’m feeling hungry
and hornie.
The worse way possible to tell your son he is adopted.
God bless the internet.
Photography...
My wife said that no one had ever used the phrase “I want
to give you my seed” until she met me.
Public art...
Has anybody ever said to you: “Get out of my bed and don’t
come back ‘til your dick is bigger.”
This struck me as....odd.....
Your secret is safe with me; largely because I don’t care.
I should be its curator...I love roast duck that much.
At first I thought this was a plane dumping empty cartridges from a mini-gun...
...but it's really how they stock an isolated lake with fish.
These are all made out of carved wood...
ANSWER TO RIDDLE: The third ant was a liar.
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