TUESDAY #2046

Quite possibly the last soccer posts for the next four years...

Watching the game on the ISS...

We should have seen this coming...

Words of wisdom from this dickwad...

Now we can go back to the way it was: Countries that give a shit about soccer and countries that have been to the moon.

A glitch in the matrix?

Like statistics? God I hope so...

I forgot what this map means. I left it in just to teach myself a lesson...through embarrassment....

The quantum world is unusual.

Atheists hate sneezing.

It's all about the light...

This young man just heard that his girlfriend has read and understands the terms of Rule 39....

To wit...Rule #39: any time a woman is in the woods alone with a man she loves, she must get naked. No excuses.

I had a long discussion with a real chef about what Americans will and will not eat...

 I contend that they will eat ANYTHING if cooked properly and let's take snails as an example.
I read that 80% of the world at some sort of insects....we here in the USA don't. Why is that? We eat lobsters, which is like the cockroach of the sea. We eat oysters, which god knows how the first guy even tasted. What I'm trying to say is, don't let bullshit you learned from stupid people keep you from experimenting. And by stupid people I mean your parents and grandparents who meant well, but had no idea what they were talking about other than what they had learned from their equally stupid parents and so forth. You, Gentle Reader, DID NOT look out to be born to the parents who had everything figured out. I just don't work like that. So, please, open up your mind and experiment with strange foods. Please.

 Women have known for a long, long time how to distract men during gaming...

Israel said it shot down a drone from Gaza a week into its offensive, the first reported deployment of an unmanned aircraft by Palestinian militants. Israel said it shot down a drone from Gaza a week into its offensive, the first reported deployment of an unmanned aircraft by Palestinian militants.

(we can expect to see this happening in a town near you)

A typical day in Hong Kong...

Not really. I think it was a protest.

 I'm getting so many mixed signals here...

But that's one fine looking weapon.
Let's talk weapons for a moment.
I'm a single-action revolver kind of guy. I like to think if the shit ever hit the fan and I had to defend myself, I would be highly stressed. Highly stressed people panic. Panicked people don't aim......then, abruptly, you are out of bullets, having shot a half dozen or so holes in your ceiling since the recoil would elevate your barrel with each shot. A single shot will not allow the panic to waste all your bullets in one...spasm. 
Makes sense to me.

I find it amazing the variety of things that make different people smile....................take this guy...

No...really....TAKE this guy!

You bet this guy's mother ever told him not to play with his food?

You either die a hero or live long enough to die from Alzheimer’s.

When the moon is directly overhead, you weigh slightly less.

Easy way to untangle your headphones...

During sex my wife screams "MAYBE, MAYBE, MAYBE" just to keep me on my toes.

Had I been mayor, I would have strengthened the bridge...

People are saying that Lil Wayne was sent by god to teach people how to rap.

I painted something very similar to this a long time ago...

But mine was a reproduction of Mozart's handwritten music. I projected it so that it would be perfect. Then right before it was to be dedicated, a music teacher INSISTED that I change a sharp sign (#) because Mozart's looked more like a 4. I refused and he again INSISTED that I provide the paint so he could do it himself and since he funded it, I gave it to him.

I tried to find that hand written music to no avail. But the "perfect" sharp sign looked completely out of place.

A couple of OOMVO's concerning caregivers...

From an email from a trusted advisor...

England sent a generation of criminals to the other side of the planet and those criminals created a society with a lower crime rate than the society they were expelled from.

"Anybody know how to get red wine stains off a baby's forehead......I'm asking for a friend."

 There is so very much wrong with this picture...

 Did you notice she's wearing those stick-on soles that almost fit her feet?

With a city that large, I think about the size of things like water treatment plants and garbage dumps. What about the morgue(s)?

This is a mobile shower facility for homeless people in San Francisco...

Ice cream too frozen to scoop out? Just put the spoon in the microwave for 30 seconds on it's highest setting. Too frozen ice cream won't be of any concern very soon.

Let's talk tattoos....

I hang out with a lot of young people. Most, if not all, have tattoos. I have nothing against tattoos...I like them, but these same people complain about not having money to fix their car, or pay the electric bill, etc. Then I notice the new $500 tattoo. I just don't get it.

And relatedly, a young woman told me that her and her live-in boyfriend have been saving for years for a down payment on house so they could get married.

She confessed that he became very angry when he found out she had a secret stash of almost $1000 for her wedding dress. She asked me...the wise old man...if he had a right to be upset. I asked something about real priorities and she said that she has been dreaming about wearing a beautiful wedding gown since she was a child. 

This is what I wanted to say...

...but I didn't...realizing that NOTHING me or anyone else could say would change the way she was programed.

Now go back and look at that photograph.

I find it hard to believe that there are STILL people who haven't seen this movie...

You know what we should do? Send up probes to see if there really is a heaven in outer space. Oh, wait….

I couldn't agree with this more...

Just think, Brazil, that was 49-7 in dog scores.

I have known several female dancers...

Every one of them were very nice people. I wonder if that's a requirement.

Yet another use for old shipping containers...

THAT IS FUCKING GREAT!!!

I just wish I were younger and I would be all over that.

So I did the next best thing. I sent pictures of the above to a talented young artist I know with this explanation...

Old shipping containers are cheap...relatively.

This guy stacks, welds them together, then paints murals on them.

It is a BRILLIANT idea and just might work for more more rural areas that don't have very many large walls.

Think about this carefully.

This is a real slate walk...

I watched "How It's Made" and discovered that now they laser cut the pieces from a large slab so that the individual pieces fit together like a jigsaw puzzle to mimic the craftsmen's skill. I hate it. I hate everything about it.

Follow the money...

 You find out who stands to make a lot of money from marijuana being illegal and you will find who has been buying our politicians.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have that many people right in the palm of your hands for a few hours?