FOLIO OLIO: THURSDAY #2097

NEWSY BITS...

Looks like we are at war....again.

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An aid worker sprays the corpse of a man killed by Ebola with disinfectant...

But it looks like we have a medicine that works...so, at least we got that going for us.
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Tornado from a Russian dash-cam...

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Guy runs out on the pitch...and takes a shot...

The judge only fined him but did not ban him from stadiums, reasoning that all the fans came to be entertained and he offered just that. Plus, he admired the young man's skill in almost scoring...TRUE.
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Studies have shown that the most effective form of birth control was working at a Toys R Us for a week.

I have a urinal in my studio and the drain in the bottom is asymmetrical like this and it drives me nuts.

If you haven’t recently said, “I’m sorry, I’m all out of fucks to give,” then you need to get control of your life.

One would think they must be very hungry to risk suck injury...

In that shallow water, my money is on the lions.

Am I the only one?

Just another tool in my innuendo toolbox.

Speaking of wood...

That is a bullet that was sawn in half.

A friend of my bartender came in the bar today and said to me: “I read your blog and you are so ordinary looking.”

When you take Nyquil and Dayquil at the same time.

Assuming you weigh 150 pounds and you shit .75 pounds a day, imagine a big pile of shit the size of you coming out your ass a couple of times a year.

I've been noticing gravity since I was very young.

Wall advice can tell you a lot about the person...

Of all the people I know, most of them won't even miss an appointment when they hear of my death. I do not find that depressing.

I found that very funny.

I feel extremely fortunate that I found someone just as weird as I am to share my life with.

Said to be motivation for Pooh...

The parenting skill I'm most proud of is being able to shove three chocolate chip cookies in my mouth and talk normally when my kid walks in.

Photography...

Is your neighbor a depraved serial killer? No? How do you know for sure?

More silhouette murals...

Back when women were much more modest...

"Well, I least I don’t have a dirty body."

I liked this movie very much...

What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?*

As I understand it, the US has scheduled a mission for 2030.

*A fugitive.

How.....unusual...

If I had one of these I wouldn't be able to keep my eyes off of it...

So what if I'm watching every episode of "Leftovers", drinking beer and smoking cigarettes at 11am on a Thursday? What have you done today that's so special?

I like that very, very much.

A photographer in Utah started a nude portrait series. From his website, "These are nude portraits in the sense that I, the photographer, am nude, while the subject is not."

I almost put this in my "Saturday Things Going To Shit" file, but it was just too funny to wait...

Some days I make myself go 24 hours without complaining...not even once, and it really makes a difference. Try it.

Socks...

I'm assuming they go up and over the tank at some point in the cycle.

Shit you don't see everyday...

An Ukrainian serviceman is seen next to a sight for a gun near the eastern Ukrainian town of Luhansk.

I like to freak my dentist out by seductively licking his fingers during procedures.

Nothing says "high-functioning alcoholic" like being really good at darts.

One Of My Very Own...

A mind is a terrible thing to waste. Unless you're stupid. In which case, who cares.

My brother does this and it drives me nuts...

The most important thing I learned at church was that I didn’t want to be there.

Jesus!

Straight guys should never eat food shaped like a penis in public.

Okay, I'm impressed...

Never, ever, begin a statement with “I’m not a racist, but…”

Do you know how good it made me feel when I was told my English is good by an English woman?

What if Lee Harvey Oswald just hated parades?

I helped make a stack of paper like that for the electric company's both at the state fair to encourage recycling. We had a 2" pipe running up the middle and attached to the ceiling so it wouldn't fall over.

These Bucky Balls are now illegal and I think it's because of the choking hazard...