THURSDAY #2132

WHAT, ME WORRY?

It might be just me, but that almost-too-chill response by the US government in regards to the death of the ebola patient in Dallas is how 100% of pandemics start.

William Coleman III of Gresham, Oregon, was robbed of his Walther P22 handgun. The gun was stolen by a young man who walked up to Coleman, pulled out his own gun, and said, 'I like your gun. Give it to me.'

(lesson learned: never show off a nice gun)

 Shit you don't see everyday...

Children's books that actually exist...

The best education you will ever get is by listening. 

Every person has a story.

I didn't vote. Did you vote? Who voted?

A couple of movies I recommend for Halloween...

The Vatican needs me.

The first armed airplane of the Serbian army in 1915...

Everything is easier said than done...except talking.
That's the same.
(I find that sort of thing very funny)

The Dalai Lama at age 2 in 1937...

 Have you ever heard how they pick the next Dalai Lama after the last one dies? It's hilarious.

Ansel Adams, 1979. He broke his nose during the 1906 San Francisco earthquake, and never had it fixed...

I never knew that.

Salads help you lose weight because they're gross and you end up not eating them.

Illuminated tires invented by Goodyear in 1961....

I actually think this is a good idea....increased visibility and all.

Construction of The Lincoln Memorial in 1921.

I can never concentrate. I think I have 80HD.

And this thing is probably spinning at unbelievable speed...

I’m not going to have a funeral. I’m going to have a wake. But I would like to have a couple of guys who look like FBI agents walk around and write down everybody’s license plate number…just to fuck with the guests.

Is it just me or is that creepy as shit?

NASA has published these two images of the Aral Sea, which used to be the fourth biggest lake in the world before the Soviet Union plugged into the rivers that fed it to irrigate massive agricultural areas. The photo on the right was taken in 2000. On the left you can see its current state.

I'm having trouble believing that. I've driven completely across Kansas...twice...and the roads are few and far between. Yet it looks as dense as South Carolina where you can't throw a dead cat without hitting a road.

Did you notice that it’s never your successful friends who send you inspirational quotes?

But we all know they picked the best photo from 09 and the worse photo from 14...still it is telling.

Cuban-American artist Jorge Rodriguez-Gerada demonstrates how a ‘rover,’ or high-precision GPS marker, was used to create his six-acre sand and soil ‘facescape’ on the National Mall in Washington, Oct. 1, 2014.

You think they let people walk on it?

My version of Fashion Week would be making it to Friday without vomiting on myself.

I had a guy recognize me in my dream last night from another dream of mine that he was in.

I think they are becoming self-aware.

Do you think mosquitoes are influenced by my blood alcohol level? I would like to think so.

One Of My Very Own...

Why don’t schools teach kids how to create fancy signatures to prepare them for the real world?

I once had sex on the 15th hole of a mini golf course after hours.
(there's a hole-in-one joke in there somewhere)

This is one of my beautiful servers...and friend....

 She was very excited that she and I have very similar sunglasses.

Some one brought a purse into my wife's store to resell and it's worth $2000....

Yes, you read that right - $2K. And here's the rub. It takes an expert to tell the difference between that purse and a $50 ripoff. You literally have to count the threads in the seams and stuff like that. So the question begs to be asked, if they are by most measures exactly the same, why is one so much more expensive?

Life is much more difficult for some people.

But what about people like me - the privileged class - white, well-educated, somewhat intelligent? Do we fill fulfilled?

Sadly, for far to many of us the answer is no.

So, wanting to feel like you think you "ought" to feel, many turn to chemicals...

 But I think that the trap people fall into is having expectations that are just too damned high. People have fallen for the myth that being happy is something other than surviving without pain and having some one to love and, perchance, to be loved in return.

Don't make it so complicated. Do you know that if you get sick or injured you can go to the best doctors in the world to have treatment? Then you are already in the top 10%. Got enough to eat? Feel safe? Warm enough in winter? Of course you do. So relax....you have made it. You have won the existence lottery.

This stonemason is an artist...

You should be required to read a book for every 10 selfies you take.

 Nothing but the facts, ma'am...

To whoever invented the zero…thanks for nothing.

I saw a guy walking down the sidewalk, stop, then head in the other direction. He did that without checking his phone. What a weirdo.

I’m thinking of filling my wife’s shampoo bottle with mayonnaise just to see what happens?

Yeah, I fell for that old trick also. 

How to statue...

Safety rules these days are ridiculous. When I was a kid, I never wore a helmet while cycling around my neighborhood, and I turned out fine and I never wore a helmet while neighboring around my cycle.

Would you like this house in your neighborhood?

What do you do with all those left over weapons?

Make an Art Installation..."Gun Country", Michael Murphy...

The main reason the Ice Bucket Challenge was so very successful...

Dying is easy...

When we were dating, my wife used to whisper cute things after sex, like “go home”.