WEDNESDAY #3800

One Of My Very Own

Every young person is just one or two bad decisions from being like Lakeesha. 

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EMAIL: 

ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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Found some more too funny to pass up.

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NOTE: This post is running a little fat. Luck of the draw I guess.

INFORMATION OF WHICH YOU MAY BE UNAWARE

I had no idea.

Please tell me that's not photoshopped.
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I'm pretty sure that all golf club heads don't do that.

I've been told that in golf you can use any ball you want, but clubs are restricted.
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A COUPLE OF WORLD WAR II FACTS
In May 1945, Six people in Oregon were killed by a Japanese Bomb.

Above is what the weapon looks like. Japan launched over 9,000 of them to wreak havoc on America’s forests during the war.

In Lakeview, Oregon, Mrs. Elsie Mitchell, and five neighborhood children stumbled upon a Japanese balloon bomb in the woods. Unbeknownst to Mitchell and the children, the balloon was armed, and it exploded soon after they began tampering with it.

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In 1945, American soldiers, French prisoners, and German Army soldiers fight side-by-side during the battle of Castle Itter, against the 17th SS Panzergrenadier Division.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_for_Castle_Itter
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WHEELED VEHICLES FACTS

 I once pulled off on one of those emergency lanes to take a pee. What I didn't know was that it was covered in about a foot of pea gravel and my front wheels sunk immediately and I didn't think I was ever going to get out of there.

 Pea gravel is what they use on many curves on a Formula One track, used to stop an out of control car dead in its tracks.

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Gauge changing train bogies.

Using this 'variable gauge', a train can go across international borders.

Back in the day, countries used different gauges, primarily to prevent a train-bound invasion from a neighbor country. This was changed to a universal standard in Europe, but in many states, trains come to a stop at an international border, and people disembark and get on another train. And, freight has to be unloaded and loaded, adding to the cost involved.
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LUNAR MISSIONS

 During the Lunar descent, Armstrong, who was piloting the Lunar Lander, saw his heart rate rise to 156 bpm at touchdown. Several alarms were received during the descent and he only had 16 seconds of fuel remaining when he landed.

 Stepping on to the Lunar surface. Armstrong was at 112 bpm, which means he was more anxious about leaving the space ship than he was blasting off.

Here's the lunar module wheel that solved many of the problems with traveling in dust.

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ROCKS THAT CAUSE HARM

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MEDICAL FACTS

I'm taking a medication that disallows me from ever eating a grapefruit again. I find that odd.
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The wife of a friend had such a rare blood type that was even named after her - The Semenot Strain. (not sure about the spelling)
She, likewise, donated blood as often as possible and did not charge for her extraordinary service.
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ECOLOGY FACTS

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https://amp.cnn.com/cnn/2019/04/29/business/renewable-energy-coal-solar/index.html
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Wife: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?

Me: Into the Witness Protection Program.

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HUMANS ARE AN ODD LOT

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That look...glance really.
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We all have that one friend...
 

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Normal people having fun with language.

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Ouch, Wendy's! 

I'm putting together another Being Souther: A Tutorial post. That last entry almost got shifted to it.
But in all honesty, with no panties and a long shirt, she'll fit right in at Bama.
Speaking of incest...

As the royal family can attest all too well, there is a glaring drawback to fucking your relatives.

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Wife: So, what was the issue?

Plumber: You had hundreds of Q-tips clogging your toilet.

Wife: 

Plumber:

Wife: I ran out of toilet paper.

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PEOPLE MORE FAMOUS THAN I

The best part of being a rock star?

The caterer I knew who was invited up to the motel rooms of a touring rock band found the whole band naked by the time the girls got there. True
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 But it was this image that caught my eye.

 He looks EXACTLY like a local muralist named Blue Sky.

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We all need to be reminded of this from time to time.

Michael Caine and Shakira Baksh married for 42 years.
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The man with Colonel Sanders is the American Arthur Julius.

Mr. Julius made the world's greatest contribution to rectal hygiene since the invention of the bidet.

I'm referring to the miracle that is Wet Wipes. In my opinion, Mr. Julius ranks right up there with Jonas Salk, Yuri Gagarin, Rowan Atkinson as true international treasures.
There need to be poems written and statues erected to commemorate his monumental achievement.

All hail Arthur Julius,
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God: How’s it going on Earth?

Angel: They made a mayonnaise flavored ice cream.

God: Send another flood. Send several floods.

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WOMEN ARE JUST DIFFERENT

There is no greater achievement by male or female than giving birth. I truly believe that. 
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You think she's mimicking rolling dice?

I don't either.
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An all female crew.

Can you imagine what this country would look like if we went back to the days when women, more or less, couldn't do anything but be nurses and teach school?
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Look, lady, you're the one who is showing enough cleavage to hide an unabridged dictionary.
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Pay attention.

It's all just so silly. Folio Olio was yanked from the airwaves because of nipples. Maybe I should have claimed I had photoshopped men's nipples onto the ladies.
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But if you think that surgery would never happen, I can't think of ANYTHING a woman wouldn't do to improve her looks.

Where the fuck did they find those models? The Sears Roebuck catalog?

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People complain a lot about the airport but I find it pretty hard to criticize a community that so strongly embraces breakfast pizza and sleeping on the ground.

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SOCIAL ISSUES

That's why I advocate a name change. 

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 Fuck! All this time I didn't even know that was an option.
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One of the reasons Americans think we are all going to shit.

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And the reason we won't do anything about that is that we will have to pay a little more taxes. 
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 https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/immigration-border-disease-risk/

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I totally concur.
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Enough is enough, Democrats. Let's get on with governing and leave the man alone. 
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I've given this advice to young people for decades.

If you mention that you are thinking about making a major change in your life then you MUST do it. Or you will forever play the dreaded game of What If, and you don't want to be my age playing that soul killer. 
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Please read this...

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