About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Wednesday, February 5, 2020

WEDNESDAY #4059

One Of My Very Own
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EMAIL: 
ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com
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Last Super Bowl post...I hope...



If emotion alone could win a game...


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Got 10 minutes for dog humor?

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NAUGHTY BITS


When Momma says to come right now, you come right then.
I lost my virginity at a family reunion under similar circumstances.
^^A1^^



^^A2^^


 ^^A3^^

 ^^A4^^

 ????
^^A5^^

[verification needed] 
^^A6^^

 ^^A7^^


^^A8^^


8
^^A9^^


^^A10^^


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Parents: Be yourself.

Also parents: No, not like that.

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S.T.E.M MATTERS

A computer model of the distribution of space objects in the Earth's orbit.
^^B1^^

This boy is finally able to use his right hand thanks to a bionic arm.


And...
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
^^B2^^

What are you going to tell your grandchildren when they ask what you did when the scientists were sounding the alarm over the hazards of climate change? Are you going to have the guts to tell them you ignored them or that you bought Big Oil's conspiracy theories? 
^^B3^^


How wonderful. I wonder what kind of plant that is.
^^B4^^



Educational films like that, and Apollo 13, and the Marsian made a ton of money and taught us some science stuff rather painlessly.
We desperately need many more like them.
^^B5^^

SOURCE: CLICK HERE 
^^B6^^



SOURCE: CLICK HERE
^^B7^^


Think of the special fuels, lubricants, etc that have to be used in such an environment.
^^B8^^


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Shoutout to my wife who saves documents every 2.1 seconds while working on them because she lost one file 21 years ago and won't be caught slipping up again.

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ON CHANGE AND INNOVATION

Water bus in Tokyo, called "Himiko"
 It reminds me of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea with Captain Nemo.
The old, slow, wooden ferry from Cancun to Isla Mujeres was replaced with this. 
The problem is that once inside you can't see the horizon, which greatly increases the chances of seasickness.
^^C1^^


And...
^^C1A^^

Just because it innovative doesn't make it better...
 ^^C2^^

Where is this man doing his bike trick?
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Look at the visual clues.
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 ^^C3^^


We could ask that question of every generation...

I have never been very fond of jumping on fashion bandwagons.
^^C4^^

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^^C6^^


Ladies, nobody cares if you jiggle. I promise. Instagram Women Are Choosing Not To Shave For Januhairy.

I find that refreshing.
But there are always bitches like this to make others feel guilty.
^^C7^^


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People who say that looks don't matter are almost always ugly.

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ATTEMPTS AT HUMOR



^^D1^^

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^^D3^^

Getting rejected without ever saying a word.
Buster Keaton - Seven Chances (1925) 
^^D4^^

 ^^D5^^

The mascot was the bears, so they trimmed the bushes to say BEARS. But for one solid day, we were the PENiS.
 ^^D6^^

It's just an oversight...
Over...sight 
^^D7^^

 ^^D8^^

A guy bought a coffee mill and asked his son for help using it. Went to read the directions and...
 ^^D9^^

^^D10^^

^^D11^^

^^D12^^


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“I broke something and realized I should break something once a week to remind me how fragile life is.”

Andy Warhol

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REALLY CLOSE CALLS

Remember this?
He came within feet of death.
^^E1^^


 ^^E2^^

^^E3^^


Very fortunate but I think it knocked her out. 
^^E4^^

This is the future: stops automatically to avoid an accident.


Collision Avoidance stopped his car for him.
I want Collision Avoidance.
^^E5^^


I think that dog knows that only food goes in pots and he's having none of it.
^^E6^^


Fuck Kim-Jong Il.
^^E7^^


^^E8^^

When EVERYONE does the EXACT wrong thing...
With horrifying sound:
SOURCE: CLICK HERE
^^E9^^

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 Jesus says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I am going to the Father.”
 So where are the powers of miracles that Jesus gave you?
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You MUST turn up the sound.
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3 comments:

Scott James said...

Puzzle Time = The prisoner says, "You will not shoot me".
Explanation - "We will hang you if you lie", means that if they hang him that implies he told the truth. Therefore, he didn't lie and can't be hanged.
"We will shoot you if you tell the truth", means that if they shoot him that implies he lied. Therefore he told the truth that he would not be shot, but once they shoot him it becomes a lie.

There is no way to kill this man if he just says, "You will not shoot me".

Anonymous said...

what if he says nothing

Ralph Henry said...

I'm pretty sure it would piss off the guy holding a loaded weapon.

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