About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Saturday, August 19, 2023

SATURDAY #5351

One Of My Very Own

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EGG BOX UPDATE



Each egg has been named. Of the millions of similar items, chances are only one of them is an SX, 6, Q, 16, AA, Z8, 6D, or 3G, etc. In my opinion, naming things is important.

After sitting in a box for years, the eggs had to be scrubbed. Then I smoothed them with steel wool. I spray-painted a small area toward the top of each egg black and stuck on 1/2" vinyl letters. Then after respraying them white, I carefully peeled off the letters. This worked very well. I was extremely disappointed, however, that they looked too much like the numbered ping pong balls they use in Bingo Parlors. 

More on that tomorrow.


Welcome Singapore. I hope you are all having a wonderful day.



Every time an actor is interviewed about how they gained weight for a role they say "Honestly I just ate really nasty disgusting garbage for a month straight" and then they go on to describe my normal diet that I've been eating for 76 years.

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When is it too late to have a baby shower? Because my mom never had one when she was pregnant with me and I need some clothes.


RATHER SERIOUS MATTERS FIRST


Another example of believing it when I see it.

^^A1^^

^^A2^^

I would bet money that she is not the child's mother. A babysitter, sister, or aunt maybe, but not his mother.

^^A3^^

Encounters with small unidentified "objects," sometimes in swarm-like groups of as many as eight. Sightings of other objects, including some characterized as drones, flying at altitudes up to 36,000 feet and as fast as Mach 0.75. Another apparent small drone actually hit the canopy of an F-16 Viper causing damage. These incidents and many more, all occurred in or around various military air combat training ranges in Arizona since January 2020.

SOURCE

The area in red is RIGHT OVER MY HOUSE!!!

^^A4^^

Apparently, women just want to vent and don’t want you to fix their problems. Just listen to them and tell them you understand how it is frustrating.

*You young men might want to write that down.

^^A5^^

3 years difference between photos.

"I have awakened the darkness. 

I am the one who seeks vengeance."

They murdered her father and she's about to John Wick every Russian she finds.

^^A6^^

Trust my gut? The thing that can't even handle hot wings anymore?

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Sorry for anything I said or any gestures I displayed while it was 103 degrees outside.


FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY


^^B0^^

*He will never ever see the inside of a jail cell.

And...

*Viewer Contributions

^^B1^^

Same in English but there is no visible way to tell where to put the accent. You either have to know or have a dictionary that tells you how to pronounce the word correctly. You want to pronounce "how" like "cow", not like "low". Otherwise, you definitely will get slapped.

^^B2^^

^^B3^^

^^B4^^

Leg Photobomb

^^B5^^

^^B6^^

I told my wife the story about when a guy graduated from college he drove his old car to the junkyard and just gave it to them. He took the tag to the DMV to turn it in and was asked for his insurance number. He said all that information was in the glove box and she said it was required. So, that clever bastard just said, "Seven", and the lady was fine with that.

^^B7^^

After he retired, my father used to scream at the people on game shows when they did something stupid. That motivated me to be even more productive when I got to his age. And I have.

^^B8^^

^^B9^^

^^B10^^

Another clip as old as the internet.

^^B11^^

And that is why you practice such things.

^^B12^^

The Most Predictable video on the internet...

^^B13^^

Stretchy Armstrong Brutalized

^^B14^^

Does it feel good for the Transformers when they transform or is it like oof owie owie owie?

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Every man's favorite boob size is whichever one's right in front of him.


HUMAN BEHAVIOR


"I'm only going a couple of miles."

^^C1^^

At least he wore a helmet.

^^C2^^

^^C3^^

^^C4^^

^^C5^^

A job that even I am qualified for...

"Can you count to three?"

"Yes."

"You're qualified."

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That person desperately needs earphones pumping in a book on tape.

I wonder if that one index finger gets tired.

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But wouldn't it be fun if that really isn't his job? Maybe he just walked in and started doing that, liked it, and then came back every day.

^^C6^^

"I've never come this way before."

(read that again)

^^C7^^

Remember these ladies?

A total lack of situational awareness.

^^C8^^

PEOPLE WHO ARE GOOD AT WHAT THEY DO


Why does he have a shovel on the roof?

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LATER: Maybe using mortar on a tile roof.

^^C9^^

^^C10^^

Back Flips

^^C11^^

Old World Skills

^^C12^^

Pizza Flipper

^^C13^^

Have you ever wondered why men's and women's shirt buttons are on opposite sides?

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Don't be so hard on yourself. The mother in ET had an alien living in her house for days and didn't notice.


WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT


^^D1^^

^^D2^^

^^D3^^

^^D4^^

Cross stitch????

^^D5^^

How wonderful.

^^D6^^

^^D7^^

Amazing...again.

^^D8^^

^^D9^^

^^D10^^

^^D11^^

^^D12^^

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This man is going to

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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

C9
Maybe he has a shovel on the roof so he can get down?

Anonymous said...

After c13 :
"Have you ever wondered why men's and women's shirt buttons are on opposite sides?"

The buttons are backwards for each spouse so that when they're facing each other It's easier to undress your spouse.

Anonymous said...

Puzzle. Time: watch his step

Ralph Henry said...

Dear Button Expert,
That's brilliant! Thank you.
RH

Anonymous said...

that cross stitch i know that map off hand thats inferno with the 'awp' - i recognize it from heart since counter strike is one of my favourite games

and that person not worried about what happened, idk maybe it was a surprise its the reason i kept my daughter on a toddler leash never know a kids reaction and i like to think id be one of the people to rush off and help someone else if that happened

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