About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Saturday, October 21, 2023

SATURDAY #5414

 One Of My Very Own

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WORDS SPELLED CORRECTLY


^^A1^^

^^A2^^

Do they still load planes backward - front to back?

^^A3^^

They asked another guy what his mother said when she found out he acted in such an awful movie and he said she said, "Thanks for the Mercedes."

^^A4^^

^^A5^^

Indeed.

^^A6^^

Oil. My southern accent says it OL.

A man once said that he could tell exactly where you are from by listening to you pronounce five words: awl, owl, all, Al, oil. I put that in one of my novels and my character said, "All, all, all, all, all. How'd I do?"

^^A7^^

It's the funniest kerning problem I've ever seen.

^^A8^^


^^A9^^

*Viewer Contribution

^^A10^^

How does Ibuprofen know where it hurts?

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All the stuff in your house used to be money. And all that money used to be time.


EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED


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Fishing

^^B13^^

It must be hard for his cultists to continue claiming he's innocent when his coconspirators are pleading guilty.

^^B14^^

Are you a void person or an abyss person?

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You don't need more books but what if the books need you?


OBJECTS OF INTEREST


I once spent weeks painting murals in a huge 500,000-square-foot factory. I spent a lot of time with the chief engineer who was in charge of designing machines to accomplish any task that was required. He told me that he considered his work more art than engineering. I think about that often.

^^C1^^

The Glacier Express

^^C2^^

What do you suppose that is?

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I would rather them be as big as a dinner plate and then sliced like a pizza.

^^C7^^

That looks very expensive.

^^C8^^

Allow me to compare that clip to my Food For Thought sections. I have no idea what that is or even if it's real but it interests me to look at it. The same is true for Food For Thought items - just interesting things to think about.
^^C9^^

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The Royal Flycatcher (female)

^^C11^^

“Beaver’s chew marks on a tree that I found.”

They eat bark.

^^C12^^
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Speaking of...

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Bushbabies

^^C14^^

Piano

Why or how are some keys being depressed/played when he’s nowhere near touching them?

"It's a Disklavier piano, a hybrid acoustic/electronic outfitted with electronic sensors for recording and electromechanical solenoids for player piano-style playback."

^^C15^^
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A mining or caving lamp has calcium carbide placed in a lower chamber, the generator. The upper reservoir is then filled with water. A threaded valve or other mechanism controls the rate at which the water is allowed to drip into the chamber containing the calcium carbide. By controlling the rate of water flow, the production of acetylene gas is controlled. This, in turn, controls the flow rate of the gas and the size of the flame at the burner, and thus the amount of light it produces.

^^C16^^

Turns out I'm "woke". All along I thought I was just compassionate, kind, and good at history.

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My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so fucking hilarious that I make the computer laugh.


US HUMANS


I'm the guy to teach my grandson how to do that.

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She's a swimmer!

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Wow.

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Human beings have been in the Americas for at least 23,000 years.

Human footprints at White Sands have been reliably dated by multiple methods to 23000 years ago.   Happy Indigenous Peoples Day.

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I posted that again to make this point:

Those people left evidence of their existence. But so did this bitch...

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Painting

Somebody wonders if it could have been reversed and they started out with a photo and painted it orange.

^^D11^^
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Street Art

I would give that man every dime I had on me.

I was once at a festival and a guy dumped out a very large trash bag full of trash. Then he began to play the drums on the objects. 

He was great! He worked so hard that he tore holes in both knees of his pants. He was sweating buckets - yet he played on. When he finished the crowd clapped and then a few people tossed him some coins. I freaked, ran to the middle of those assembled and took out a wad of bills, threw them on the ground, and screamed "BILLS ONLY". Then I walked around encouraging everyone to donate. So much money was thrown that the drummer had trouble picking it all up so I helped him. When I handed him all the money I had collected he thanked me and I just shook my head and said, "No, man, thank you. That was a performance I will never forget. And I didn't.

^^D12^^
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Styrofoam

For whatever reason, I found that laugh-out-loud funny.

^^D13^^

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6 comments:

Anonymous said...

^^C14^^

Poor things get killed due to superstition.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Galago#Relationship_with_humans

Anonymous said...

^^C15^^

That's an annoying piece of music.

Anonymous said...

^^C16^^

Reminds me off https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limelight

Anonymous said...

Puzzle Time
Impala

MIKE HARRIS said...

A7; accents.Dear Ralph, I am English. When I watch The First 48 I can understand all that the white people say, but hardly a word from the black participants, INCLUDING THE DETECTIVES. Why is this?

Anonymous said...

dude that nearly got ran over by that truck is one lucky sob

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