About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Monday, July 5, 2021

MONDAY #4576

 One Of My Very Own

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EMAIL: ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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PONDERABLES


That movie started off with great potential then ended with an old fashion shoot 'em up just like a million other movies.

^^A1^^

I made that exact point a couple of days ago!

^^A2^^

^^A3^^

I thought we had already proven the working from home did not decrease productivity. Am I wrong?

^^A4^^

I once showed up on a mural site at 4am to get ready to paint at first light to beat the summer heat. At 6am a very popular all-night bar closed and dozens of people poured out onto the sidewalk only a half block from my location. I was dreading putting up with the drunks and even crawled to the top of the scaffolding to avoid them. When a group passed under me they were having a lucid discussion of the economy. Come to find out that bar is where bartenders, bouncers, and waitstaff went to socialize after their own bars closed at 1 or 2 o'clock and they weren't drunk at all.

^^A5^^

Indeed.

^^A6^^

^^A7^^

I remember the story of a wounded WWII warrior who went home and was still denied service in a local cafe while that same cafe served German prisoners who were out on supervised work detail.

^^A8^^


I had to know how a fish could harm a submarine:

"During the 1970s, several U.S. Navy submarines were forced back to base to repair damage caused by cookiecutter shark bites to the neoprene boots of their AN/BQR-19 sonar domes, which caused the sound-transmitting oil inside to leak and impaired navigation."


Said to be the result of a minor skirmish with one of the vicious little bastards.

^^A9^^


We should try turning America off and back on again.

^^A10^^

*Maybe I will be called a prick for always taking the moral high ground...again.

^^A11^^

During my teaching days, we had a Code Red announced over the intercom. That meant all male employees should go immediately to an area of the school. Once we showed up and a large 12-year-old was barricaded in a small office and threw everything he could get his hands on - including furniture - as we tried to gain access. I later learned that the mother begged the school district to institutionalize her son because she had to lock her bedroom door at night for fear that he would kill her.

I once had that same kid walk around my room and knock other children's supplies off their table then stood at the door and dared me to try and catch him. I refused, opting instead to call for assistance. It took two hours for the safety officer (cop) to corral him.

What I'm trying to say is that I understand the need to handcuff viscous children sometimes.

^^A12^^

Sand Viper Concealing Itself For Ambush

^^A13^^

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The Jetsons takes place in 2062 and George Jetson is 40 years old, which means that somewhere right now George Jetson is being conceived.


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*Yeah, that's more or less a grandfather's job.

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THE RATHER RISIBLE


Questions for you people who own no guns...

How do you threaten your computer when it acts up?

^^B1^^

Popcorn from Amazon..... 

Always check the size!

^^B2^^

So very silly but I still smiled.

^^B3^^

What does it say about the American education system that there's a horoscope in every newspaper in the country?

^^B4^^

I love good old-fashioned holey bread until I try and make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with it.

^^B5^^

Plot Twist: Those aren't her dogs.

^^B6^^

^^B7^^

^^B8^^

The expression on his face.

^^B9^^

When I owned bars I never had a person agree with me when I cut them off. Not one.

^^B10^^

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Vampires always seem to stop counting birthdays at some point. They are like - "I'm 400 years old."

Bitch, you're 497, stop pretending like you weren't at the Persecution of the Huguenots.


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AND AWRY WE GO


How the fuck do you catch a person for doing something like that?

^^C1^^

Public bathroom light switch.

^^C2^^

^^C3^^

Have you been keeping up with this? My alarm bells are ringing.

^^C4^^

If she can push a baby stroller she can push a lawnmower...

I once told my first wife...now ex-wife.

^^C5^^

Just another reminder to those people who still think they can drive and text at the same time.

^^C6^^

Moral: Don't be rude.

^^C7^^

She put this glass here to keep the hanging plant from dripping on the floor.

^^C8^^

I would put coming and going cameras on every school bus to catch every damn person who does shit like that.

^^C9^^

"GET ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND! GET ON THE GROUND!"  

Cop demands guy get on the ground - man falls 3 stories...to the ground.

^^C10^^

Maybe they were texting.

^^C11^^

Yeah, like we didn't see that coming.

^^C12^^

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If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?


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MAKERS OF THINGS


The world is recovering slowly. It’s okay if you do too.

I feel so proud of myself that during staythefuckathome I have never been busier. Of course, not everyone has a beautifully appointed studio that begs for attention every day.

^^D1^^

Nice floor.

^^D2^^

I am dying to know how that holds up to traffic. I think that's very beautiful.

^^D3^^

^^D4^^

That's how religious logic works...you just make shit up.

^^D5^^

It's been a long time since I posted bathroom signs.

And...

I had a male dog who squatted but that's another story.

^^D6^^

I bet that takes some practice. And it looks like you have to pay for it.

^^D7^^

Hose care center for pre-soaking, washing, pressure testing, drying, and winding hoses.

Imagine the size of the pencil you'd need to fix that thing.

^^D8^^

Many of the peach trees in South Carolina are pruned to be more or less two-dimensional. I think this is to facilitate easy picking of the fruit. You can also plant trees closer together when they are skinny.

^^D9^^

^^D10^^

^^D11^^

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An advertising agency hired me to do something with the wall adjacent to the reception area. Behind that wall was the boss's office so I painted windows with him looking out.

I duplicated it beside my studio door to make thieves think somebody is home.


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

^^D3^^ yeah, looks nice, but I'd hate to have to walk or ride a bike or a wheel chair on it.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for brightening my day!
Towanda

Crashsq said...

puzzle time 2 miles north

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