About Me

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I'm an artist, educator, militant anti-theist , and I write. I gamble on just about anything. And I like beer...but I love my wife. This blog contains observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Sunday, October 3, 2021

SUNDAY #4666

 One Of My Very Own

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EMAIL: 

ralh.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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God: Gonna add a small part in their elbows so if they hit it just right it hurts a lot.

Angels: Why?

God: I hope they call it a funny bone.


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MEMORABLE CAPTIONS AND HEADLINES


^^A1^^

*Notice the guy behind her filming that same unviolated butt.

^^A2^^

Speaking of...

Cause of Death: Embarrassment.

^^A3^^

My new favorite phrase.

^^A4^^

^^A5^^

^^A6^^

*I almost missed that.

^^A7^^

^^A8^^

*I read that as a visual gag and laughed aloud.

^^A9^^

^^A10^^

*The last time that happened to me I ended up married.

^^A11^^

^^A12^^

^^A13^^

^^A14^^

^^A15^^

^^A16^^

^^A17^^

^^A18^^

^^A19^^

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Me: I can’t handle this

People: Ask for help

Me: Ok, who do I ask?

People: It’s so important to ask for help

Me: Right but I can’t afford-

People: Shh you can’t do it alone, ask for help!

Me: How, where, what do I do

People *putting a finger over my lips*: AskFor. Help.


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RANDOM BLOG FODDER


Just another reason life expectancy is so low south of the border.

^^B1^^

Werner Karl Heisenberg was a German theoretical physicist and one of the key pioneers of quantum mechanics.

Your thoughts about this?

^^B2^^

Oppo has released the world's first phone with a collapsible screen.

^^B3^^

Nice followthrough.

As a third child, I have been on the receiving end of such antics many, many times.

^^B4^^

I seem to remember that she is Billy Crystal's mother.

^^B5^^

^^B6^^

Metallica, September 1991, 1.6 Million fans.

^^B7^^

^^B8^^

Tom Selleck explains reverse mortgages, for real.

^^B9^^

^^B10^^

An ex-bartender got a job at a plumbing company and in their manual under questions to ask was "Is your basement flooded". At the time I had never heard the phrase and they thought my ignorance was fucking hilarious.

^^B11^^

To make a grate, gate, headboard, etc, you need a mold of humid earth (silica + clay).

I am blown away by such primitive technology that is still in use. I made sculptures out of molten aluminum and a Styrofoam mold in damp sand.

^^B12^^

The newspaper tablecloth should have been a tipoff that something was amiss.

^^B13^^

A perfect demolition.

Did you notice that they first sheared the building in half VERTICALLY?!?

^^B14^^

Another 'pshoooop' from my funny friend in England.

Before.

After.

HAHAHABANANAHA!

^^B15^^

The roommate really likes that station.

^^B16^^

Uuuuuuuuuummmmmm.
^^B17^^

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You know how there are wedding coordinators? Why can’t there be moving coordinators? like, I want you to pack, move, turn off utilities, turn on new utilities, change my mailing address, clean the house and feed me.


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ON OR NEAR WATER



The new guy.

^^C1^^

Fish smarter not harder.

^^C2^^

????

^^C3^^

Lucky as a two-dick dog.

^^C4^^

^^C5^^

I would think being covered in barnacles would itch like crazy.

^^C6^^

As many are jumping in as are jumping out. What's up with that?

^^C7^^

That must be an incredible feeling.

^^C8^^

Upside down on the rocks...

Thanks, human.

^^C9^^

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A school district sent me into a high school to paint a mural but nobody bothered to tell the principal. He gave me a hallway to nowhere - meaning there were four rooms with a dead-end hallway and only one of these rooms was a classroom. That meant hardly anyone would see the mural. So I painted it so that it could only be seen from the main hallway.


Sorry about the quality of the images that I photographed right off the TV set. The devil isn't even finished. But to illustrate the illusion you need to know that the left side of the mustache is about five feet wide whereas the right side is about 30 feet.

And the lines on the canceled stamp are 6 or so inches thick near the viewer and 18" farther down the hallway.

I did not pick out the images. I left that to the students.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Re: moving coordinators--they do exist. National Association of Senior Move Managers. They tend to deal mainly with older folks downsizing and the like, but I bet a lot of them will take care of just about anybody. Here's one I used a couple years ago. www.movemaven.com.

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