STRANGER THAN FICTION....MAYBE

I'm not sure why I thought this was so funny, but I do...

I have no idea why the igloo is colored, but there's a urine joke in there somewhere...

Life's a bitch...and she's back in heat.




Just move your eye from side to side....amazing...

This is my kind of sport...

"I can't wait to see the new Smurf movie." - Nobody




This is NOT my kind of sport...

If this guy had two sons, someone would have gotten hurt within the first two minutes...

Dance like only a few people are watching....and they have paid good money to see it....and you really need the money.




This is a doll that sucks your daughter's nipple.....yeah, that's what I thought, too...

Is this real? I don't get out much...

The world population hit six billion in 1999. In only 12 years it will hit seven billion. 
And it only gets worse from there.




Americans have too much damn money...

TRUE:  There is a company that for only $1,250 they will pack a pound of a relative's ashes into 250 shotgun shells.

A new tattoo women in Europe are getting for protection from Muslim men.

Beer will save the world. I don't know how, but it will.

I hate it when I get out of the shower and have to take a shit. And shouldn't it be called "leave a shit"?

TRUE:  My bartender tried to send me an email and I didn't get it, so I asked him what he had down as my address. He told me by ending with ".yom". I said, "Yom?!?!" He said, "That's what I thought you said."

I was once trying to teach that same bartender how to create a new folder by just right clicking on the screen and picking New Folder. So I told him to move the mouse to a blank spot on the screen and he picked up the mouse and held it up to the screen. I knew I was in for a long night.

This is a functioning camera....good luck with that in Brooklyn....

These doors open only to the shape of your body....

Look at what's on the TV....

My smartphone changes "lol" to "LOL" making me sound more amused than I actually am.




??????

This shit is real!!!

We need to stop the debt ceiling nonsense and get back to creating jobs, and building schools and roads in Afghanistan.

I saw a bumper sticker that said: I DON'T MIND STRAIGHT PEOPLE AS LONG AS THEY ACT GAY IN PUBLIC




My question is, if you believe the bible and the bible says that if you believe you can handle deadly snakes, then why the fuck doesn't every believer do it?

I've been teaching myself Photoshop, and I'm getting pretty good at it.




Just because I can, that's why.

This is me just relaxing....

Freedom of thought is useless without freedom of speech.
(I just realized something: If you sometimes call freedom of speech Free Speech, shouldn't you call freedom of thought Free Thought or Free Thinking; so we need more free thinkers?)

STAR WARS TOONS OF THE DAY....

One of my very own...

WOMEN WHO LOOK LIKE SLUTS,

BUT PROBABLY AREN'T...

Every time a bra is burned an angel loses her virginity...