THURSDAY #3703

One Of My Very Own

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EMAIL: ralph.henry.at.folio.olio@gmail.com

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NEWSY BITS

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Goddamnit, this sort of problem-solving is why governments were invented. ACT you motherfuckers....ACT!

Can you imagine drug dealers switching from weed to vaccines? 

Let's make heroes out of these kids.

There's a special place in hell for Andrew Wakefield the day he croaks. The bastard sowed the seeds of this, all to make a tidy profit.

The man is a lunatic.
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Opportunity had an initial goal of covering 700 yards (640 meters) and operating for just 90 days on the surface of Mars. It exceeded expectations more than 50-fold by staying operational for over 14 years.

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It's all fun and games until the voters find out.
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 LESS THAN PRUDENT BEHAVIOR

Why?

 For the fucking ratings?

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A sexy video goes terribly wrong...

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This is an anti-vaxxer reacting to her child being attacked by a lion.

 Seriously, why is everyone smiling?

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When growing up, this was our go-to show and tell.

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It’s just a game, Focker!

 There seems to always be that one asshole in every game who thinks winning is everything.

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Lantern Festival in Thailand

That looks like a disaster ready to happen. But they have been doing it for 3000 years, so...

Maybe in all those years, they have already burned down anything of value.

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I'm betting the player knew exactly what he was doing.

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Gender is a scam invented by bathroom companies in the 1960s in order to sell more bathrooms.

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MACHINES I FIND INTRIGUING

I'm thinking your own flight simulator would be a fun pastime.

[wife's voice from other room] 

"You've now got clearance to take out the trash on Driveway 01, Captain Sugarsnuggles." 

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I've shown you this before...

Looks like a great idea, but I wonder why they felt compelled to take the rear hood off. 

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On his resume, it just says "Ramp Guy" and everybody knows what he did.

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 They need more of those to get our fatass kids off the couch.

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How they re-rail a derailed train.

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How clever.

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The blending of idioms is called malaphor. My favorite is "We'll burn that bridge when we get to it."

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INVENTIVENESS IS GOOD

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Imagine walking in and being taller than everyone else and everyone else groans because they have to change into taller shoes...again.

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Drone photography is inventive.

That neighborhood looks so very vulnerable. 

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The inside of this glacier.

Just think that the whole thing is slowly moving over your head.

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 The Europeans used what is known as the “Mediterranean draw” to pull their bowstrings back. This uses the first three fingers of the hand. However, the Mongols used their thumbs to pull the string back, and curled their index and middle fingers over the thumb to support it. This, they reckoned, was stronger and allowed for a cleaner release.

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An international student was hospitalized in China and fell under the care of a nurse who didn't speak English. Understanding the importance of getting the proper medical information across to her patient, she used some creativity to write him a detailed note that used some pretty dead on graphics.

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 Asians

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 If in the South I had to mow my lawn every morning before going to work, I would move away from there also.

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Perfect fit.

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Dating after 30 is like trying to find the least damaged thing in the thrift shop that doesn't smell.

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MORE BUGGERY FROM OUR CORPORATE OVERLORDS

Some mistakes can easily be blamed on a temporary glitch.

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Americans no longer give a shit whether it says Homemade or Factory Made - We know it is factory-made no matter.

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But this kind of false advertising should be illegal.

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If Mexico stopped exporting drugs for a month the Americans would be the ones climbing the wall.

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THE LAST LAUGHS

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 Well, someone found the G-spot.

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"Anything to declare?"

"Just that bag of huge dildos."

RH: Why is he being filmed?

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Speaking of dildos, this guy knows how to apologize.

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An old classic...

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The struggle is real.

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 As a young teenager, I did that but hit the top of my head on the board. I was literally covered in blood when I got out and walked past the other visitors on the way to the first aid station.

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 Self-inflicted Euthanasia?

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